The Consequences of a Truth Untold
by darkangel1690
Summary: CH.1,2,4 & 5 HAS BEEN REEDITED! Hermione finds out her true destiny not only as one of the greatest witches of Hogwart’s, but also as the protector of the world. Can she handle the pressure? References to Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
1. Chapter 1

_The Consequences of a Truth Untold_

**By darkangel1690**

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or the setting. They are of the creations of J.K. Rowling and Joss Whedon.

**A/N: This chapter has been a bit changed, with the help of Violet Spark thanks:) . Review and tell me what you think of the new changes!**

_Chapter 1: Hidden By Day_

Hermione Granger leaned the side of her head against the glass window. Outside, she could see blurs of trees and signs of grasslands whiz by pass her. The Hogwarts train was going as fast as usual, just like her summer.

Her summer had been… much different than what she had expected. She hadn't expected the death of the former slayer, and the rise of her powers. She hadn't expected herself to become the next "chosen one." She hadn't expected vampires and demons of all kind to be her victims and vice-versa. No, she hadn't expected these things. Strangely, she receives pure joy to know that she now has the power to control the fate of others. She was so used to being the girl that constantly had to hide behind her two best friends. She shivered from pleasure of the mere thought of her "job" and of her powers. This was a new Hermione Granger. Indeed, she's changed over the summer.

Due to the heavy amounts of training and experiences Hermione had to undergo, maturation was inevitable. She slimed down and had lost her childhood body fat. She still looked like the same Hermione, but now her hair was a bit tamer, yet still a mess at times. However, her heart-shaped face seemed to stand out more for some reason.

Her mind went to her two best friends. _I wonder how they're doing. Staying at the burrow does have its advantages, and of course, its many disadvantages. I hope Harry's made the right choice. Of course he did. Staying with Ron is better than with the Dursleys. Well then, I can only hope Fred and George haven't done anything too bad to him…_Her thoughts were cut off by the sound of the compartment door sliding open. Draco Malfoy entered and strode casually over to the bench opposite from Hermione and slumped down lazily.

Malfoy had grown taller, but he still had his same old body. Not some super strong body for him, just a strong build like all teenage boys his age. His gray shirt, however, matched his stormy gray eyes, contrasting with his milky pale skin and his silky blonde hair.

"Malfoy, get your arse out." Hermione ordered him with a McGonagall tone of voice.

"No, I don't think I will. Besides, this is the Heads' compartment, unless you've forgotten that is." He teased, while having his infamous Malfoy smirk plastered on his face. The comment only wanted to make Hermione wipe that disgusting look off his face even more.

Hermione's mind clicked. Duh! How could she be so stupid? He was second best in all their classes, so that must mean… She groaned inward. She had been so caught up with her "duty that she hadn't even though about her Head Girl duties also.

Well then, he leaves me no choice. I'll just have to deal with him as if he were like any other demon…

**A/N: Ta-da! There's the first chapter! Click on the review button to leave me some comments. They can be short if you want. I just need, (ok, WANT) some feedback for this story.**


	2. Chapter 2

_The Consequences of a Truth Untold_

**By darkangel1690**

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or the setting. They are of the creations of J.K. Rowling and Joss Whedon.

**A/N: This chapter has been revised. **

_Chapter 2: Feeding By Night_

Dumbledore finished announcing his welcoming speech and the feast began. Rom was chatted (more like flirting shamelessly) like Lavender, while wolfing down on his food but Harry kept glancing in Hermione's direction. Hermione got the gut feeling that someone was staring at her. When she looked up, she caught Harry's emerald eyes upon here.

Harry had grown just as handsome as Draco, if not more. Even before he had stepped foot into the castle doors this year, he had been nicknamed "The Most Desirable Male Gryffindor," courtesy of Lavender and Parvati. Draco had been too, although he was the most desirable Slytherin, courtesy of the pug-faced slut, Pansy Parkinson.

"Harry, is there something wrong? You know you can tell me." Hermione said soothingly as if she were talking to a sibling.

"Um, Hermione, are _you_ okay? You keep whispering to yourself things like 'I'm gonna kill him, but he's so gorgeous. But I want to kill you. That's right, he's going down.' You continued on muttering nonsense. I mean, you're okay right? You haven't been using drugs or drinking too many fire whiskeys?" His voice dropped to a low whisper,

"I'm fine. Really, Harry, there's nothing for you to worry about. It's just this- this situation I'm. Uh-" Hermione's mind went blank. She couldn't tell Harry about Spike! If she did, she would have to then explain to him about her destiny. The one thing she's learned is that secrecy is the one of the most important things when you're the slayer. She cursed herself for the words that she blurted out next.

"Malfoy. You know how he's gotten hotter? Well, I'm quite angry with him, but I'm starting to develop a- a crush. I mean, every girl's gotta have her a bad boy." She had spoke that rather rapidly that she was surprised to find that Harry had understood- he showed it to her by falling off the bench laughing.

Harry started rolling on the floor, clutching his stomach, and was visibly red in the face. Tears were now rolling freely down the sides of his face. Hermione shifted uncomfortably from all the stares that were sent in their direction.

Harry's laughter eventually died down, and the quietness of the Great Hall disappeared. The students and staff resumed their activities and Harry climbed back up on his bench.

"Good one, Hermione. No really, what is it?"

"Haha." She shifted uncomfortably for the second time that evening. Fortunately, Dumbledore announced that it was time to get settled into their dormitories. She said her usual 'good-nights' to her friends and before Harry could object, she walked over to where the heads of the houses stood with Dumbledore. Malfoy was already there, which was probably because he didn't have a 'Harry' who tended to worry so much.

"Good evening, Professor Dumbledore, Professor McGonagall, Professor Snape, Malfoy." Hermione tried her best to keep the disgust out of her voice as she said the last two names."

"Minerva, Severus, I trust you two to lead Ms. Granger and Mr. Malfoy to their dormitories without any trouble. I bid you all good-night." Dumbledore's blue eyes twinkled through his half-moon glasses. He waved his right hand before turning around and walking (if you can even call it walking; more like gliding) across the hard floors of Hogwarts to his office

Hermione went to stand on McGonagall's left, while Draco stood on Snape's right so that there would be the two heads of the houses could protect them, in case one of them decided to throw a hex.

Professor McGonagall cleared her throat. "The password is Lion's Hiss."

Snape sent a look at Draco that clearly said, "Don't do anything I wouldn't do." Before following McGonagall, robes flowing behind him.

"Password?" The ghost in the portrait asked. It showed a dark ceremony, filled with all kinds of the living dead. Hermione swore she saw a solid figure with bright fangs run swiftly behind tree. She could have mistaken that for a ghost, but then she saw it again. The red eyes, looking tentatively and hungrily at her. The next moment, the eyes vanished. This whole scene seemed vaguely familiar.

This had happened- oh yeah! This had happened about a month ago, where I had almost gotten bit if it hadn't been for Spike. Well, of course it was Spike. He's the only one stupid enough to spy on me. The vamp escaped- he left in the dark shadows of the night. Too bad…

The scene struck a nerve in Hermione. Why was this painting, of all the paintings at Hogwarts, replaying a flashback? Why was it the Heads' painting? Was it all just a coincidence? A million questions were bombarded at her. She didn't have time to think any further because Malfoy started yelling bloody murder at her.

"Mudblood Granger! Could you possibly BE any denser? The bloody Ghost's been asking for the password a million times already! always knew you would end up like longbottom someday! Lion's hiss."

The door swung open and the scenery was gone, replaced by an ordinary mirror, or so it seemed.

The door revealed a baroque room, filled with a pleasing mixture of the Gryffindor and Slytherin colors. Secretly, Hermione was jumping for joy. It was exactly like her house, something she had been doubtful in leaving behind. Draco lazily slumped down on a green sofa before standing up to start a fire in order to warm up the room. Hermione ignored the cold shivers her body was giving her, since she was used to it, and ran up to her room.

She came upon three doors. One door was the color of forest green and had a silver plague with the words, "Head Boy." The next door had the letters, "W.C." The third door, she knew, belonged to her. It was made from cherry wood and on a gold plague the words, "Head Girl", sounded like heaven and hell.

Hermione opened the door tentatively, wondering whether or not Dumbledore had put any "surprises" in there just for the fun of it. Like last year, when the former heads had entered a room with an adult-sized blast-ended skewt. It was not a pretty sight.

Hermione took a couple of steps before concluding nope, no surprises.

Her trunk laid at one corner of the room and upon it was a schedule of her haead duties. She would have to patrol with the Ferret tonight from 9:00 – 11:00.

Great work on the first day back.

Ah, cheer up. At least, you're patrolling with a hot guy. Her inner voice reminded her.

Ew! Gross, all I will do is diss him the whole time.

Fine, go ahead and diss the hot guys. That'll so help you get a date.

The clock struck 8. Good. That still gave her a full hour to get ready. She stripped her robes off and went to find some of her "usual" clothes. Dumbledore had passed a school rule that allowed students to express themselves more through their clothes- they could wear anything they wanted after classes and on the weekends.

Hermione pulled on a red t-shairt, dark jeans, a black sweater that went up to her mid-thighs and a pair of black boots. She wanted to look like a slayer and still be able to match into the darkness of night without looking as if she had been torn out of a stripper magazine. From a secret compartment in the bottom of her trunk, she pulled out a large box, fully loaded with her weapons. She picked out her usual stake, which she slipped inside the sleeve of her jacket. Before leaving, Hermione picked up her wand and a blue crystal necklace. It had once belonged to her ancestor, Buffy, a gift from Spike. Now Spike had given her the necklace, which he felt was only appropriate. Hermione was the only blood-related person of Buffy who was a slayer and had the potential of the slayer.

Draco heard footsteps. He whirled around and saw the same girl he had known since first year, though her fashion seemed to be on the darker side a bit. He couldn't help but notice the dignity and pride in her complex, which could only look radiant on a girl like Hermione. He composed himself and in the arrogant manner of his, he ordered, "Let's go."

Hermione's P.O.V.

Outside, the dark skies held a full moon, giving off a radiant shine of moonlight. The crisp clear air found at night filled our lungs. It felt good to be out late at night again. It reminds me of all the times I went slaying during the summer. Giles reminded me to be cautious. Funny, I think the thing rustling in the bushes right now should be more careful.

No one's P.O.V.

Hermione knew better than to believe it was just the wind. She had no choice, but to go after it or risk the safety of the other students and herself.

"Ferret, I say we split up now. There's bound to be no danger and wandering students tonight. It's the first day back. You patrol on that side," she waved her arm to the left, away from the forest. "and I'll patrol on this side." Hermione waved her arm to the right, towards the forest where the bushes were. Draco solemnly agreed, knowing he wouldn't have to stand another minute being alone with the 'mudblood.' With that settled, Hermione started walking away. As soon as Draco had moved a couple of meters away, she broke into a sprint, all the while making sure the Head Boy still had his back turned so he wouldn't question her actions.

In her left hand, Hermione held her stake. In her right was her wand. She could be up against anything or anyone and she wanted to be ready.

Having good peripheral vision has its advantages, as in this case. To her left, she caught a glimpse of a blood-red cape. That could only mean one thing.

Her wand was stored securely back into her pocket. Magic never really did anything to this kind of evil, but merely tickled them. She moved her stake to her right hand and listened intently for any sounds. The wind made it even worse. There were too many "whooshing" noises for Hermione to be able to differentiate the noises.

Suddenly, the creature lunged at her from behind. Being a slayer means having quick reflexes and Hermione sure had those- she easily dodged the assault.

The fight between the two seemed to go on for hours due to all the blows Hermione received. It had only been a few minutes, however.

This vampire's really good.

She was caught off guard once more, but not because of the magical creatures in the Forbidden Forest, but because she saw another person move within the trees. Either the enemy had sent for his friends or Malfoy was being bloody stupid. She preferred the former, though the latter sounded nice.

Hermione was knocked down and was pinned to the ground. In the moonlight, she could see this was no ordinary vampire. It had sprouted an extra pair of arms on each side. No wonder she was at such a disadvantage. Panic and fear flooded through her as reality hit her and the vampire started to descend down towards her neck.

A silver sword appeared out of nowhere and clashed with the neck of the vampire, beheading it. The vampire became dust and blew with the wind. A strong hand reached down and pulled her up. Her chocolate eyes met bluish-gray ones. His platinum-blonde hair shone brightly, due to the reflection of the full moon.

"Thought you could use a bit of help there."

"I was fine." Hermione snapped.

"What, no thanks? I just saved your pathetic life and I get no thanks. I seem to recall that vamp had his fangs just inches away from your pretty little neck."

"And my stake is just inches away from your pretty little arse." Hemione glared.

"You think my arse is nice? I knew it! No one can resist my sexy body."

"Give it a rest, Spike. You can be so egotistical."

"By the way, who was that you were walking with earlier? He looks kind of like me, wait a minute! Are you using him to replace me?"

"First of all, you're not my father or my boyfriend, so get off my case. Second of all, what in Merlin's name gave you that idea? That Malfoy is such a bloody prick!"

"Malfoy, eh? I hear his family's loaded. I actually might enjoy his company. Use his money a little. Get me a hot new car, some new clothes, a little blood, some fags. Yep, life would be good."

"You sound like a bratty teenage girl." Hermione put on a high-pitched squeaky voice. "I'm gonna use his money to buy me a hot new car and some cute new clothes."

"Very funny. Oh bloody hell." He groaned.

"What?"

Spike pointed a long finger straight ahead where Malfoy was walking around, screaming her name.

"What's wrong with that? It actually makes Malfoy look stupid since he's confused of my whereabouts."

"I was hoping to walk you back and then see if I could screw you."

"I knew it! No one can resist my sexy body."

"Hey! You stole my line!"

"Too bad. Ciao Spike." Hermione gave a short wave before walking up to Malfoy, who had his back turned.

Hemione withdrew her wand stealthily and pointed to the back of Draco's head and silently muttered a few words under her breath. The spell took effect immediately.

A/N: Ok, let's get things straight. In this story, Spike came back to life because the "powers that be" decided that it was best, but as you will see, Spike can't use his fangs on anyone, no matter what. He can hurt others, but only if it is for the good of mankind. Angel is also mentioned in this story (chapter 4), but I don't know whether I should make him a character. Please REVIEW.

So what do you think the spell is? I'll give you a hint it has something to do with cross-ing and the color pink. If you don't know, too bad- you'll just have to wait until chapter 3. Please REVIEW.


	3. Chapter 3

_The Consequences of a Truth Untold_

**By darkangel1690**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or the setting. They are of the creations of J.K. Rowling and Joss Whedon. **

Chapter 3: Time to Meet Mr. Pointy 

"Granger," Draco growled menacingly. "I thought I told you to stop laughing already."

"You deserve it, after all you've done to me."

"Humph." Draco was now wearing a tight jean mini-skirt that was too tight for his liking and a pink v-neck tank top that looked weird against his muscles.

"You seem to be enjoying cross-dressing. (A/N: That was the answer to the question to the author's note at the end of chapter 2.) I'm surprised, Malfoy, very surprised. Who knew you were bisexual?" Hermione paused a minute for the words to sink in, but more so to enjoy the moment.

"You know what I still can't believe?" Malfoy didn't answer, he was just determined to go to bed without anyone seeing him and wait for the spell to wear off overnight.

"I still can't believe you haven't even tried using the counter-spell."

Malfoy stopped abruptly and grew red in the face from anger at himself and at the mudblood. He slapped himself mentally for not thinking up of the same idea earlier. Actually, he had wanted to slap himself mentally, but… SLAP!

"Um, Malfoy, you're not going mental on me, are you? It wouldn't be right for Hogwart's Head Boy to suddenly become retarded. Oh wait, I forgot. You already are a retard."

Hermione walked away smirking, knowing she had won the first battle, but also leaving with the fact that there would be future battles and a war.

Spike's starting to rub off on me. Oh, well. At least it's the ferret that's on the receiving end.

"Finite incantatum."

His clothes changed back into its black collared shirt and black pants that he previously wore. Unfortunately, he was informed about the "condition" of his hair.

­

During breakfast the next morning, people kept staring at Draco, but were too afraid to say anything.

"Um, Draco, your hair's, um, different. It-it looks c-cool." Blaise Zambini tried his best o talk while stifling a laughter.

"How'd you do it? Dump a can of muggle paint on your head or something?" He managed to choke those last few words out before succumbing in to the laughter.

Draco was already grumpy from last night. To make matters worse, when he looked into his goblet, his reflection mirrored a handsome boy with…PINK hair!

"Aaaaaaah! GRANGER!"

Hermione ducked down, so when Draco looked yonder to the Gryffindor table, she was out of sight. He marched out. She was going to pay- that is, if he found her.

Insider the Great Hall, laughter rang put loud and clear. The sounds resonated off the walls, giving a deafening echo. People were dropping and rolling feverishly, as if they were on fire, with tears rolling down their faces. You could make out a few distinct words, such as "Draco Malfoy", "best hair of the year," "pink," and "most desirable Slytherin, my ass."

"Miss Granger, 20 points from Gryffindor." McGonagall stated seriously, but it was clear that she had been laughing due to her flushed face.

"Don't worry about the points, Hermione. That was worth it. It was a gift that was totally priceless." Harry crackled. His round glasses were placed crookedly on his nose, matching his goofy expression.

­

Malfoy stomped up the stairs and without knocking, stampeded into Hermione's room. She wasn't there. As he was leaving, a blue glint caught his eye.

As he walked closer, he saw that it was the same blue crystal necklace that she had worn yesterday to patrol. He put it into his pocket, hoping that Hermione would notice it missing. The necklace was now his "hostage" and he was going to keep it that way until he received the "ransom".

Next to the necklace was Hermione's stake. It looked that a plain piece of wood with a pointed edge- nothing special. When he looked more closely, however, he saw that he was wrong. There was finely carved engravings on it and the wood was smooth on ever inch. When he touched it, it didn't even feel like wood, it felt like silk. Curiosity overcame within him as he continued to finger and play with the stake. Unfortunately, he wasn't aware of the time.

Breakfast was over and Hermione walked back to the Heads' dormitory to fetch the books needed for her Potions class next.

"Lion's hiss."

She stepped inside and walked quietly up the stair steps, her foot naturally making no noise at all. As she neared her room, she heard noises coming from inside and saw that the door was open. When she peeked inside, she a certain pink-haired boy playing with HER STAKE!

Hermione picked up a Quidditch flag that Ron had given her from near her doorframe. She threw it precisely straight at Malfoy, but it didn't it him. She didn't want it to. Instead, it banged into the wall just a few inches from where his face was. He turned slowly around and there stood the one person he wanted to kill.

"Have you gone mad? That cold have done permanent damage you know." He roared.

"Well, I wouldn't have done it if you weren't such a nosy person and decided to go through my stuff!"

"Muderer!"

"Pompous!"

"Mudblood!"

"Ferret!"

"Know-it-all!"

"Dickhead!"

"Bitch!"

"Jackass!"

"Gasp! I am shocked! Miss Goody-Two-Shoes using such foul language? And I thought that the Gryffindors were Hogwart's perfect little angels. I guess I was wrong. What a shame! Wait 'till the professors hear about this!" He strode out, chin high, thinking he had finally won.

"Accio!"

Immediately, the blue necklace flew out of his pocket and into her hand. Draco stopped abruptly.

"Now what is my necklace doing in your pocket? You weren't going to hide this from me, were you now?"

Hermione walked over the wall where the flag was and easily slid the flag. She made it look as though the heavy flag was as light as a safety pin.

"How did you-"

"Oh, I can do more, Malfoy, much more."

Hermione pointed the top sharp edge towards Draco, who started backing up, only to feel his stiff back hit against the closed door. A dead end.

"Wha- what are you going to do witht hat? They'll send you to Azkaban if you do anything! I know how much you hate it there! You wouldn't dare, Granger, you wouldn't! "

"Oh, wouldn't I?"

Fear flooded inside him as the cold metal came in contact with his pale, milky skin. Now, he was really scared.

"Time to meet Mr. Pointy, Malfoy."

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry, Granger! I won't look or touch your personal belongings again. I swear! I swear! Wizard's honor!"

Hermione lowered the flag and stepped back.

"Alright."

She walked over to her desk and picked up her Potions books.

"Alright? That's it? I can leave?"

"Finite incantatum," Draco's pink hair changed back into its natural blonde color. "Yes, now you can leave."

Hermione exited the room. Draco listened for her footsteps going down the stairs, but he heard none. Bewildered, he went silently to his next class, Potions, still stunned.

A/N: Hey readers, I would really appreciate it if you would REVIEW- you can leave good (preferably) and bad comments.

PLUS, MORE OF SPIKE COMING UP IN THE NEXT CHAPTER!


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or the setting. They are of the creations of J.K. Rowling and Joss Whedon.

**A/N: This chapter has gone through a bit of re-editing. I personally like it better. Tell me what you think by reviewing!**

_Chapter 4: Aciculums_

"Good night, guys."

"What? Hermione! It's too early! Dinner just ended!" Ron wailed.

"I have an essay on the Gibo Auja due in three days for Ancient Runes."

"Fine, bye Hermione." Harry surrendered, while Ron's protests were muffled by Harry's hand covering his mouth.

* * *

_Many young inexperienced wizards use their own blood to activate the runic symbol, Gibo Auja, which is particularly dangerous. Wizards throughout the centuries most likely use dragon's blood, only because it is a substitute that is easier to obtain. Although unicorn blood posses a powerful effect on most charms and potions, it is rather quite useless in runic works. As the famous medi-wizard, Dublin, once stated, "Finding the auja in the gibo can only be worthwhile if-"_

POP!

Hermione turned around to release her wrath on the intruder who dared to interrupt while she was doing her homework. She stopped, however, when she found herself face-to-face with no one other than…

"Spike! I have work to do and an essay to finish!" He peered down at the parchment on her desk. It was filled with so many words that little space was even left on the parchment.

"Not important. Its just rubbish."

"Spike," she growled. Hermione picked up her assignment and waved it in Spike's face. "This is not rubbish. What is rubbish, however, are your boots. For god's sake, they look like fisherman's boots."

"Hey! Well, I'm not the one who has to write some," he paused to think. "-some bullshit."

"Nice comeback." Hermione rolled her eyes.

"Sod off." Spike took a look around the room. "This is a pretty nice joint. Comfy bed, I might add. I'm stuck sleeping in some blasted 'ol bed in my crypt. Can't get in any beauty sleep."

"That might explain why you're so butt-ugly. Your face looks like it's been the ass of a donkey." Which was really not true. Spike had grown leaner and his tight black shirt showed off his 6-pack. He was incredibly strong, although his muscles did not show it. He was not like those men who would have these abnormally gigantic muscles that looked like they were on drugs. His chiseled face held two perfect blue eyes and his platinum blonde hair was slicked back. He almost resembled a twin of Malfoy, only except Draco no longer used hair gel, he just let it hang naturally.

"I'm ignoring that last statement. So, where's the bathroom?"

Hermione turned around and gave him the most incredulous stare she could muster. "You're a vampire. Go find it yourself."

"Alright, alright. No need to get your knickers in twist. Although, I would like to see them." He said suggestively.

"Urgh! Get out and go to the cruddy bathroom already!"

Spike walked out and looked at the other two doors to the left. He was tempted to see what the Head Boy's room looked like on the inside, but restrained himself, knowing fully well Hermione would kill him if he dared to. Instead, he turned the doorknob of the water closet.

The bathroom was fit for the king of England- no, scratch that, all the kings England ever had. The white marble floor reflected a clean shine. He flipped a red switch and nearby, the candles gave off a sweet scent of pumpkin pie.

"How does Hermione do it? She has the best things in the world, yet she refuses to take time off to enjoy them! She thinks doing a bloody assignment is more worthwhile. Yeah, worthwhile my ass."

He locked the doors before flicking on a silver switch, which he found turned on the water and he climbed into the bubble-filled bathtub. The lights dimmed a bit and the candle aroma filled his nostrils.

"Food now would be nice."

As if on cue, a plate of cubes appeared before him in mid-air. A note attached to it read, "_Anything your heart desires." _Spike took a cube, examined it, and popped it into his mouth. It tasted like blood, yet it wasn't- it was much sweeter. It was too good to be blood.

This crap is excellent! That's what the note meant… 

­

Hermione finished her essay and yawned. Spike still wasn't back yet. Her assignment had been to write a foot long essay, but being the over-achiever that she was, she had managed to write three feet long worth of parchment.

I hope he bit Malfoy. Then, Dumbledore'll have to pick another Head Boy. Hehe.

She knocked on Draco's door and there stood Malfoy with his neck still smooth. _Damn it. _He was half-dressed and was dressed in only his silky green boxers. His hair was slightly ruffled and his face held not sign of a smirk anywhere.

"Hey Granger, what can I do for you?"

He's so hot! Wait, he's being civil? Never mind about that, his body looks so yummy. No! No! Bad Hermione! Bloody hormones.

"I was wondering if anybody's been in your room within the last hour or so. Like maybe a deatheater, demon, witch, wizard, and oh, I don't know, a vampire?"

"Why? Jealous of the other girls?" His infamous smirk appeared.

"Just answer the question, Malfoy." She sighed. She was sick of his wisecracks.

"Can't say that I have. But if I do, I'm sure my screams and groans will be loud enough to hear.'

"Good night, Malfoy." Hermione gritted through her teeth. If he said one more word to her, she'll-

"Oh, I'm sure I'll have one." He drawled.

Hermione clenched her fist so hard, her nails were digging into skin and she was bleeding. She quickly healed herself after she had been able to detain herself from kicking down Malfoy's door and hexing him into oblivion.

At least the conversation started out civil. I still have to find Spike, though. Where could he be? Wait, what had he asked right before he left? Think ,Hermione, think! What was it? "So, where's the bathroom?"

Her eyes slowly wandered right to the direction of the middle door. She tried the handle- it was locked.

Damn! He's a vampire for Merlin's sake! He can't be that fascinated with a bathroom of all things!

"Aloha mora!"

The door clicked open and Hermione stomped in, only to find a very naked Spike drying himself with a towel.

"Aaah! My eyes! It burns from the ugliness!" She shrieked and yielded her face with the back of her hands.

"Oh, cut the crap, Hermione!"

She turned around and placed her hands in front of her like an obedient girl. She started staring fixedly at the intricate designs on the wall.

"It's alright for you to turn around. You're lucky. Not all girls get to see this kind of beauty. I know you just want to take in all the sexiness. Stop trying to resist something you want." Spike teases.

"As matter of fact, I'm fine right here. I don't need to besmirch my eyes more than I already did. I think I've seen enough of one of the more repulsive things of the world.

Besides, I think I'm already scarred for life."

"Sure, whatever, you say."

Hermione put on a mocking soft tone. "Sarcasm is only the weapon of the weak. I think you are just saying that because your puny little brain can't handle all those big words I used."

"I just happen to be the only good vampire you have a connection with. Just be happy I can be a good influence on the others of the undead."

"Yeah… if I were a vampire, I would _so_ listen to you, a vampire that can't bite or hurt anybody. Yah, and you forgot Angel too."

"Angel? All he does is run his silly excuse for a job everyday. He only helps people."

"I'll just have you know that 'Angel Investigations' have been getting an influx lately.

He's certainly in better conditions than you. At least he's not dressed in rags."

"What's wrong with my clothes? They're just a couple hundred years old."

"My point exactly. Tomorrow, I'm going to Hogsmeade and you're coming with me."

"Ok, first it was Hogswart, now it's Hogsmeade. What is with all the Hoggy-ish ideas around here? Who the hell comes up with these names?"

Hermione rolled her eyes and walked out and into her bedroom. Spike hurriedly dressed and followed her, closing the door behind him.

"Hey! You can't just walk out on me like that!" Spike yelled across the room at me. The room was pretty wide, about fifty feet by fifty feet.

"Uh, Spike, yes I can! And I'll do it again." Hermione stepped out of the room for a few minutes and came back again.

"FYI, Spike, I _live_ here."

"Where will I stay?"

"You can sleep on the floor."

"I was hoping for the bed."

"No! No way are you sleeping in my bed!"

"You can't expect your guest to sleep on your blasted rug! Tell you what, I'll let you take me to Hoggy-whatever without complaining if you let me sleep on your bed. Deal?"

"Deal." They shook hands and climbed into bed. Hermione went on the right, while Spike would sleep on the left. She turned off the lights and cuddled into her blanket.

Suddenly she felt a finger running up and down her back. He moved is whole hand over her body and slid it across her waist. Shivers ran up and down her spine at his touch.

"Ugh, Spike, stop it. Nothing's going to happen tonight, so don't you dare get your hopes up."

"Buffy wasn't so reluctant."

"I'm not a slut."

"You're so hard-headed. I bet you've never kissed a guy."

"Yes I have."

"Oh yeah? Who?"

"It's none of your business."

"Really?"

He turned her around so that now, she was facing him. He didn't expect what he saw. On the contrary, he saw that Hermione had fallen asleep on him!

"Am I really that boring?"

"Yes." Hermione muttered in her sleep.

Spike groaned and tried to close his eyes, but sleep didn't come easy. It never comes easy to vampires. He was just about to count sheep when a loud rapt came from the door. Hermione's right eyelid fluttered open and she peeked out. When the knock came again, only more loudly this time, her left eye popped open.

"Who is it?" She called out.

"Granger, we have to patrol tonight. It's Tuesday."

"Darn it! How could I have forgotten? It completely slipped my mind. Hold on a minute, Malfoy." Hermoine called back from where she lay.

­

"Spike! Let go of my arm; I have to go get ready. It's really hard to do so when someone's holding onto you."

"Why?" Spike laid lazily on the bed.

"I have to patrol. It's Head Duties."

"Patrol? With another guy? You always patrol with me."

"Well, I can't risk to forfeit my Head Duties."

"Fair enough. I'm going with you."

"What?" Hermione froze.

"I'm going with you." Spike repeated.

"You can't! What will I say to Malfoy or even Dumbledore if they see you?"

"Dumbledore?"

"The headmaster!" Hermione explained.

"You people seriously need a name change. I mean, who the bloody hell wants a name like Dumbledore! It sounds like the name of the guy who's off his rocker."

"You have no idea." Hermione muttered under her breath. Out loud she said, "Hey! Spike. Stop trying to change the subject. You're staying here, whether you like it or not."

"I don't like it so you can't make me. Besides, I already had a mother; I don't need another one. I'm not a five-year-old kid. And I'm going with you!"

"Well, you're certainly acting like a five-year-old." She shot back.

As Hermione walked out of her room, Spike followed. Malfoy raised an eyebrow questionably.

"He's coming too?" Malfoy asked quizzically.

"He's-" Hermione started.

"Yes, I'm coming too." Spike finished.

Hermione glared at him, and he glared just as hard back. Malfoy stared back and forth at the competitors in the glaring contest, wondering with amusement who would crack first.

"Fine, he's coming too." Hermione stated and walked away, fuming that she had lost. But she had no choice, really. It was either agree to let Spike come along or stand there the whole night participating in the glaring contest. Yes, it would take the whole night- she'd tried before.

Malfoy and Spike followed sluggishly behind her (except Draco was walking aristocratically sluggish) as they discussed life in England. Spike had come to England, in search of Buffy.

(Draco doesn't know about the slayer thing yet and he doesn't know who Buffy is either, except that she was his former lover.) Buffy died in a car crash (it's a lie- Buffy died naturally) and Spike had met Hermione after Giles introduced him.

It was then when they heard Hermione's scream piercing through the night. The two guys rushed to her aid and saw her surrounded by five fang-bearing creatures.

Malfoy froze out of fear and shock. Spike, however, attacked immediately.

Hermione had her stake put and was fighting two vampires at once. Spike was also handling two. She couldn't find the other one. Then, she spotted him, coming from behind Malfoy, ready to bite him. Malfoy looked oblivious to the danger behind him. She quickly staked one of the two and ran as fast as she could to Draco.

She came just in time and stabbed the vampire from behind and was able to catch the another one off guard with her fast reflexes, causing the once solid vampire to deteriorate into dust. Spike finished off the last one and walked over to where Hermione and Draco stood.

Someone clapped from within the bushes. A cloaked person stepped out of the cover of the darkness of the trees. He was a pale man with long black hair, dressed in a black cape, with the underside being blood red. He wore a white dress shirt and black pants. His black hair shone in the moonlight… along, with his fangs.

_Oh, goodie! Another of the undead! _Hermione thought.

This vampire was rather handsome, however, and glided gracefully over to Hermione. He spoke in an American accent.

"Well done, Miss Granger. You truly are the slayer, the chosen one." He circled around her. "How does it feel to know you have so much power in your hands?" He took her hand and kissed it, while still keeping his eyes on her. Hermione yanked her hand away.

"For starters, it makes me want to turn that mouth of yours into dust.

"Gonna try and kill me, eh? Not going to happen tonight, my dear. Not tonight. I happen to "personally know" Buffy, if you catch my drift. But unfortunately, I'm not quite acquainted with you, _yet_."

"You lay one hand on her and you're going to be gone with the wind." Spike growled.

"That's supposed to scare me? From you? You are a disgrace to vampire name! You shouldn't even have to privilege to have vampire blood! Can't even use your fangs properly."

Spike gave a deathly glare at the stranger. The stranger turned back around to face Hermione and bowed.

"Allow me to introduce myself. I am infamous Count Dracula."

**PLEASE REVIEW FOR MY SAKE! TELL ME IF YOU LIKE IT. TELL ME IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT AND WHY, PLEASE!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or the setting. They are of the creations of J.K. Rowling and Joss Whedon. **

A/N: Not all of this is recap. It's only to refresh your memory. This is an extra long chapter. **This chapter has gone through only the tiniest of re-editing.**

Chapter 5: Hogsmeade Hysteria 

_RECAP:_

"_Malfoy, get your arse out." Hermione ordered him with a McGonagall tone of voice._

"_No, I don't think I will. Besides, this is the Heads' compartment, unless you've forgotten that is." He teased, while having his infamous Malfoy smirk plastered on his face_.

* * *

­ 

_Professor McGonagall cleared her throat. "The password is Lion's Hiss."_

_"Password?" The ghost in the portrait asked. It showed a dark ceremony, filled with all kinds of the living dead. Hermione swore she saw a solid figure with bright fangs run swiftly behind tree. She could have mistaken that for a ghost, but then she saw it again. The red eyes, looking tentatively and hungrily at her. The next moment, the eyes vanished. This whole scene seemed vaguely familiar.

* * *

_

_Panic and fear flooded through her as reality hit her and the vampire started to descend down towards her neck. A silver sword appeared out of nowhere and clashed with the neck of the vampire, beheading it. The vampire became dust and blew with the wind. A strong hand reached down and pulled her up._

_"Thought you could use a bit of help there." Spike said.

* * *

_

_­__Draco was already grumpy from last night. To make matters worse, when he looked into his goblet, his reflection mirrored a handsome boy with…PINK hair!_

"_Aaaaaaah! GRANGER!" _

He marched out. She was going to pay- that is, if he found her.

_Inside the Great Hall, laughter rang put loud and clear. You could make out a few distinct words, such as "Draco Malfoy", "best hair of the year," "pink," and "most desirable Slytherin, my ass."

* * *

_

_As she neared her room, she heard noises coming from inside and saw that the door was open. When she peeked inside, she a certain pink-haired boy playing with HER STAKE!_

* * *

_Hermione came just in time and stabbed the vampire from behind and was able to catch another one off guard with her fast reflexes, causing the once solid vampire to deteriorate into dust. _

_Someone clapped from within the bushes. A cloaked person stepped out of the cover of the darkness of the trees. He was a pale man with long black hair, dressed in a black cape, with the underside being blood red. He wore a white dress shirt and black pants. His black hair shone in the moonlight… along, with his fangs._

"_Well done, Miss Granger. Allow me to introduce myself. I am the infamous Count Dracula."_

* * *

Dracula suddenly disappeared after the introduction, leaving three very stunned people.

Malfoy was the first one to break the silence. "Who would've though? Mud-muggleborn Granger, a slayer!"

"Nice save." Hermione said.

"And friends with a vampire too!" Malfoy added.

"Hey! I'm a good vamp, you know. You say it as though it's a disgrace!" Spike gritted through his teeth."

"Both of you- behave!" Hermione said while holding Spike back from beating Malfoy up.

"Guys! First, they're civil, and then, next thing 'fore you know it, they're fighting! You boys are so immature!" she sighed.

"Hey!" Spike and Malfoy said at the same time.

"What do you mean 'Hey!' You guys are immature and you know it!"

"But we're immature _men_." Spike put emphasis on 'men.'

"Urgh!" Hermione threw her hands up in the air and walked off. It was impossible to argue with those two teaming up against her. _They_ were just impossible.

The two blondes hi-fived each other before following Hermione. She tried to ignore them as they started to taunt her at the fact that she lost an argument to "immature men." This made Hermione more irritated. She tried calming down by paying attention to how the surroundings and the night sky were beautiful, but to no avail.

They returned to their dormitory and walked up to their respectable rooms. Spike and Hermione were headed towards her room when they felt Draco's eyes on them. They turned around to face him.

"You don't bite, do you?" Draco asked hesitantly.

"No, he could, but he wouldn't. Oh, about that, obliviate." A bright light emitted from the tip of Hermione's wand and was aimed at Draco's forehead. He suddenly held a blank face and lingered outside for a while, staring at the Head Girl's door, where Hermione and another guy just entered. He entered his own room, took off his robe and his shirt, and threw himself on the bed. Draco stared at the ceiling and tried to clear his mind, but all he could see was Hermione with another blonde guy, going inside her room.

_Can't believe I'm actually thinking this but for once, I wish I wasn't a pureblood._

* * *

Hermione quickly got dressed. She now sported light blue jeans, a maroon sweater, and a gold sash. Chandelier earrings dangled from her ears and her hair was tied with a gold ribbon to show a graceful neck. Her wand stuck out of her jean pocket and her stake was cleverly hidden underneath her jeans, held by a black band, right below her knee.

Spike started stirring on the bed, but immediately jumped out when he saw the sunlight dancing on his face. Hermione muttered a spell and a gray aura formed around Spike.

"What the bloody hell did you do to me?" Spike cried.

"It's only a spell. No need to get all worked up. It allows for you to be outside during the day without getting burned alive."

"That's bloody wonderful."

"Anyways, get dressed. We're going to Hogsmeade today, remember?"

"Oh, yeah. I won't find any hogs there, will I? I'm allergic to them."

Hermione rolled her eyes.

"No really, I'm allergic to hogs. I once had a nasty allergic reaction when I went to the zoo."

This cause Hermione to frown worriedly and back away slowly towards the door.

"I'll meet you downstairs, 'kay?" she said slowly, still backing away slowly with her hands in front of her. She closed the door and descended down to the common room.

Draco was already down, trying to pry Pansy Parkinson off of him. Don't get him wrong, Pansy was a really good friend. She'd let him copy her homework, went patrolling for him when he was prefect last year, etc. She even respected muggles and half-bloods; she wasn't a stuck up nose brat like the other Slytherin purebloods.

"Pansy, no really, I have some Head's duties to attend to." Which was clearly a lie.

"But Draco, you promised you'd go to Hogsmeade with me and Blaise." She whined.

Hermione decided to help him out by going along with the lie. "Malfoy, hurry up and get your girlfriend out. We have a Heads' meeting here in five minutes and Dumbledore'll expect us to be ready by then."

Malfoy's face darkened at the word 'girlfriend.' Hermione knew that Pansy and him were friends and that was it. She just wanted to tease him about it.

"Hello Granger. I know for a fact that there _is no_ meeting. I'm a prefect this year and I reviewed the schedule last night." Pansy said politely, as though she were talking to one of her fellow Slytherins.

All of a sudden, Pansy's eyes widened and she let go of Draco's arm, bolting for the door. After she had left, Hermione followed the direction of Pansy's eyes and saw Spike, who had changed… literally. She started to reprimand him, all the while laughing too.

"Spike! That was very rude of you! Pansy could've died from a heart attack because she saw you as a vampire. We could have verbally persuaded her, but never should you scare her out of her wits like that!" Hermione playfully slapped him on the arm. She erased Malfoy's mind of the memory and turned back to Spike.

"Now, hurry up and get something to eat! Then, we're off to see Hogsmeade, but we also have to wait for-" Before she could finish, Spike had dashed straight to the bathroom to get the delicious cubes. But Hermione stood there clueless of what he was doing, wondering whether he was a real person or a dog, wanting the toilet _really _badly. "-Harry and Ron."

* * *

Hermione tapped her foot impatiently by the lake. Every so often, Spike would step on her foot to make her stop, but she would still continue again after he had lifted it.

"Where could they be? They were supposed to be here half an hour ago."

Spike kicked the water. "Maybe they died."

Hermione spun around. "What's the deal with death and you vampires?" After a moment's pause, she spoke again. "Don't even answer that."

Just then, the front doors opened and Harry and Ron could be seen running across the fields in a hurry to get to the lake. Well, Harry was running. Ron was more like being dragged by the collar by Harry who was scolding him for being such a pig. Ron was currently half-eating, part-dragged, part-running. The hurried eating failed because right after the boys had reached Hermione, Ron started choking and she had to help him.

_What a bunch of idiots,_ Spike thought.

"Harry, Ron, I want you to meet Spike. Spike, this is Harry Potter," she gestured her arm to Harry. "and Ronald Weasley." She moved her arm towards Ron.

"Hi." Harry extended his hand to Spike and shook hands.

"Hello, you can just call me Ron." He and Spike also shook hands.

"Wait a minute, you're a vampire! I know one when I see one. Hermione, Harry, run! Run for your safety! Hurry Up! We've got to tell Dumbledore!" Ron was about to run off when Harry grabbed him by the back collar and pulled him back, holding him in place. Ron stopped, confused. He looked over at Harry and then Hermione. Harry was the first to speak.

"Ron, if he's vampire, which I'm sure he is, why isn't he burning up? Hermione's the only person smart enough to protect him, which means she trusts him. We should to." Harry said patiently and calmly.

_I guess they're not as dumb as they seem,_ Spike thought.

Hermione smiled. "He's a harmless vampire, I'm sure, guys. No need to worry. Okay, introductions are taken care of. Let's head over to Hogsmeade now." Hermione said eagerly and immediately led the way.

* * *

"I'm sorry, miss, but this is a Quidditch store. We do not carry any undergarments, and no, for the millionth time, we don't know anyone by the name of 'Blondie Bear." The storekeeper said.

"But you must! Blondie Bear's been here and I know it!" The girl pouted.

"Miss, please understand, we're telling the truth. Why don't you try another store?"

"I did! I tried every shop and none of them's seen my Blondie Bear! Oh, poor Spike, you should have never broke up with me! Now, you're probably all lost and alone!" Harmony pouted again and walked out, trying desperately to find her "bear."

* * *

"Are we there, yet?" Spike whined.

"Nope." The Golden Trip answered in unison for the hundredth time.

_Only a few more feet, _Spike thought. _And I get to say…_

"Are we there, yet?"

"Nope." Came the reply.

Okay, just a few more and… 

"Are we there, yet?"

"Nope."

Haha, this is getting on their nerves. Hermione has murder written all over her face, Ron's clenching his fist, and Harry's…what? He looks calm, he doesn't even look mad; he's smirking! Oh, the nerve of him, I'll show him.

"Are we there, yet?"

"Nope." Ron replied.

"Ditto." Harry said at the same time.

"Holy shit- YES!" Hermione smiled slyly.

"Really?" Spike suddenly snapped out of his thoughts and looked around, but he saw nothing.

Hermione winked at Harry and he caught on. "Ha! You got…" Hermione paused. "PUNKED!" Harry and Hermione finished and hi-5ed each other and laughed. Spike glared and stuck his hands in his coat pockets aggressively. Ron just looked plain confused.

"Let's play a game of…let's see, spill or spell," Harry suggested. Spill or spell is similar to the muggle game, truth or dare. "I'll go first. Ron, spill or spell?"

"Um, spill?" Ron said uncomfortably. He had known Harry for seven years now, and he knew well enough that Harry would make his spills and spells worthwhile.

"Ok, who was the first Slytherin girl that you ever snogged?"

"Oh, come on, Harry! You know the answer!"

"Yes, but they don't!"

"Fine," Ron's voice dropped to a low murmur. "Millicent Bulstrode."

Harry decided to push it. "Who? Speak up, I can't hear you."

"Millicent Bulstrode." Ron gritted through his teeth.

Hermione laughed so hard that she lost her balance and Spike had to catch her.

"You snogged the Slytherin pig? Ha!"

"Who's she?" Spike asked.

"Her." Hermione jerked her head to a girl flipping damaged black hair and faking a laugh at whatever joke Pansy had made.

Spike made retching noises. "Her? Of all people, her? I would rather be staked than have to kissed her!"

"I can arrange that." Hermione said, shifting into her slayer mode.

"On the other hand, I take that back." Spike said shifting his weight away from her.

Ron spoke up next. "Okay, my turn. Hermione, spill or spell?"

"Spell." She answered boldly.

" 'Mione, I cast a spell on you to-" he looked around for an idea. "-to stay away from the library for five days."

"Ron, you know I can't. That's practically like asking me to fail all my classes."

"Fine, I'll think of something else. I cast on spell on you to go up to Malfoy and punch him on the face the next time you see him."

"Ron, I might get in trouble." She growled.

"_Might._ Sorry, 'Mione. It's either that or the library."

"Fine, I'll do it. Well anyways, it's my turn. Spike, spill or spell?" Spike didn't answer. Apparently, he had spaced out. "Spike, spill or spell?" she repeated, but he still did not answer.

She sighed, but then seemed to cheer up. "It's payback."

Ron gulped. "Ron, spill or spell?"

"Spell?" he said weakly.

"I cast a spell on you to confess you undying love for _Pansy Parkinson."_ Ron turned red at the name.

"I don't really care when, Ron, but just as long as you do it within three weeks, just in time for the ball."

"What ball?" Both the boys were confused.

"The Halloween Ball, silly. Malfoy and I have already planned individually over the summer and then we're supposed to put our ideas together and assign the jobs to the prefects all this week. Malfoy and I will be heading it, of course."

Harry and Ron scowled at the sound of his name. "If Malfoy treats you badly in any way, just tell us, and we'll pound him." Ron hit his fist against his palm.

"I'm a big girl and I'm sure I can handle him by myself. And don't forget Ron, you still have to go up to Pansy and-" Ron interrupter her: "-and confess my love to her blah blah blah; I get it."

"Are we there yet?" Spike started again.

"No." The three Gryffindors said simultaneously.

"Are we there yet?"

"Ditto."

"Are we there yet?"

"Zilch."

"Are we there yet?"

"Yes." They said in harmony.

"Oh no, I'm not _that _daft. Don't think I'm falling for one of your tricks again." Spike said, crossing his arms on his chest and shaking his head.

"No, we're serious. Welcome to Hogsmeade." Hermione said.

Spike looked around him and saw rows of cozy, old-style shops in front of him. He scoffed. "This is _Hogsmeade?_ The _Hogsmeade_ everyone's so excited in shopping at? It looks like a pig's stalk."

Hermione hit him upside the head and led them to _Vogue a la Mode_, where they sold clothes of all styles, trends, ages, and genders.

Hermione looked around for her clothes, while Harry and Ron led Spike to the men's section on the other side of the room.

Hermione's P.O.V.

I searched every rack and all I could find were one pair of black pants, two pairs of jeans, one dark red halter-top, and one long-sleeved shirt with a red rose enlarged on the side with a gold outline. Everything else was way too short, too tight, too revealing, or just plain ugly for my liking.

I then heard a rack come crashing down on the other side of the room. The men's side. I could hear a worker yell at someone or someone_s_ in a thick British accent. I have an accent too, but his was almost incomprehensible. I should have known. I saw Harry and Ron, wands out, throwing spells at Malfoy, and vice-versa. Spike was just standing there smirking. I calmed down the worker and promised him that I would take care of it.

"Petrificus Totalas." Harry, Ron, and Malfoy now lay stiff on the ground. I turned towards Spike and threatened him the same would happen if he didn't wipe that smirk off his face. He was immediately emotionless.

"Now, I intend to leave you three boys in this state until some unfortunate soul comes upon you," I inwardly smiled when I saw their anxious eyes. "But if you promise to behave, you'll be able to leave this store unharmed. Do I make myself clear?" At that moment, I felt like a mini-McGonagall.

I changed the three back, but not before taking ten house points from Gryffindor and fifty from Slytherin. Oh, the unfairness of life. I discreetly put a silencing charm on Malfoy as I brought him back to his former state. Harry and Ron glared daggers at Malfoy, and he smirked back, but that was as violent as they dared to be. As Malfoy was walking out the door, he decided to say some insult to get us fired up, but hilariously, could not.

"Awww, has the poor ferret gone mute?" I teased. Malfoy shook his head violently and pointed a finger into his open mouth.

Harry came up next to me "No, 'Mione, I think you're wrong, I'll don't think he's mute at all."

Malfoy threw his hands down with relief.

"I think he's trying to play charades." Harry grinned.

Malfoy drew his hands to his chest like an 'X' and brought it out, repeating the process over and over.

"Oh! I know, the fella's trying to make the letter X" Spike suggested.

Malfoy shook his head again and pointed to his mouth.

"Lips?"

"Mouth?"

"Tongue?"

"Food?"

"Water?"

Suddenly Ron exclaimed: "I got it!" We all turned to look at him, even Malfoy.

"Sex!"

"Huh?" Harry was confused, so was I.

"Ron, how'd you go from Malfoy to water to _sex?_"

Ron explained. "Well, when you're having sex and you're nearing climax, water or something like that comes-"

"Urgh!"

"Ron!" We all made disgusted faces at him.

"What? I was only saying that when you're having-" he defended.

"Okay, Ron, we get it."

We turned back to Malfoy now. He made another attempt at pointing at his mouth with his index finger. I, of course, knew what he wanted- to talk- but I wasn't going to let a chance like this slip away. When he saw us make no response, he tried a different strategy. Malfoy was now doing what looked like a modified Macarena.

"Oh! He wanted to dance! Why didn't you just say so Malfoy?" We then started to dance. Malfoy shook his head and gave up, walking out of the store. But before he left, I remembered the dare and stopped him. He turned around with an eyebrow. The egotistical prat probably thought I was so in love with him that I couldn't resist the temptation to give him a good-bye kiss. Wrong! A full-blown punch hit his face. Hard. Boy, did it feel good. After he left, we ended up bursting out laughing.

As we excited _Vogue a la Mode_, I was carrying one bag in each hand, Harry and Ron were both carrying one bag each, and Spike was carrying _five_ bags. He really must've needed new things.

All of a sudden, a blonde girl was running towards Spike, mad and happy as hell. She looked vaguely familiar, but I couldn't just place my finger on who she was. Spike, however, had a different reaction- he dropped all his bags and ran like he was running from the devil himself. That reaction helped trigger my memory. There was only one girl on this planet that Spike would run away from. Harmony.

"Blondie Bear! Blondie Bear! You came back1" The blonde girl jumped on Spike and nearly crushed him to death. Yup, it's Harmony. She had a death grip on whoever had been so unlucky as to have been her boyfriend. What'd you expect? She's a vampire.

"Harmony, get off me, you mad woman." Spike rudely shoved her off of him, but she only clung onto him tighter.

"Hermione, help me!" He choked out.

"Hermione?" Harmony became even more excited and looked around, in search of me. Unfortunately, she saw me before I could hide. I would rather see the life squished out of Spike, rather than her cling onto me. Harmony was a great friend, once you got to know her. She really was. She was like a blonde version of Ginny, a genius compared to the goonies Malfoy hung out with, and a loyal and determined person. Harmony _never_ gave up. That's why she makes such a great secretary for Angel.

"Hermione!" Harmony ditched Spike and came to me to give me a hug. Spike took the opportunity to apparate. Damn it, I should have never taught him how to do that. At least I still have Harry and Ron. _POP!_ I spoke too soon. What loyal friends Harry and Ron are! I made a mental note to hex the three guys later, but right now, I need to deal with Harmony.

She had started to cry. "Sp-Spike… he-he left me hanging-ing…a…gain." Now her tears were practically pouring out of her eyes. Scratch that- not practically. Literally.

"Come on Harmony. It's not that bad. There's plenty of fish in the sea." I comforted.

"But-but I wa-ant a-…"

"Yes?" I asked impatiently.

"A BLONDE!"

I scoffed. She wanted a _blonde?_ Maybe it was a blonde thing. I mean she is a blonde obviously. Why am I using the word 'blonde' in every sentence? See, there I go again with the word 'blonde'! Urgh! I really gotta stop doing that!

"Here Harmony. Shhhh. Calm down. There you go. Are you calm now?" By now, her sobbing had subsided and she was only hiccupping. She nodded.

"Listen to me and listen to me good, 'kay? There's a club nearby for vamps who are off human blood. They help me and I help them. It's a two-way trade. You could also go back to Angel. He'd probably know more than I'll do."

"Thanks Hermy! You're the best!" She ten gave me another bone-crushing hug and left waving to me until she was out of sight.

Pansy approached me and to my surprise, she said, "Thanks Granger."

I was utterly confused so she added, "For what you did for my cousin, Harmony. She really needed that extra boost."

"You and Harmony are…cousins?"

"Yeah, she's from my mum's side. Thanks again, Granger. I owe you one. She was practically like a sister to me." And with that, Pansy left and headed towards a Quidditch shop, no doubt to find Malfoy and Zambini. Which reminds me. I still have to get the three boys before I get to head back to Hogwarts. Which also reminds me- I have to kill them for ditching me.

However, all thoughts of murder were erased from my mind as I entered the Three Broomsticks. I found Spike, chugging down another glass of Firewhiskey, very strong wizard alcohol. Four empty glasses were already in front of him, in a zigzag line- a poor attempt at lining them up. Harry and Ron sat there gaping like fish, shocked that a person could handle such potent. I walked over there inhumanely quick and swiped the fifth glass away just as he was finishing the last drop.

"Spike! You're going to get drunk!"

"Oh, hiiiii Myyaaaaaaa. It's okay. I caaan beaaaar it. Louuuooook. Seeeeeee?" Spike slurred. He made a feeble attempt at standing up, but swaggered a bit and I forced him down with one hand.

"Look what you've gone and done to yourself! Urgh!" I seemed to be saying "Urgh!" a lot lately thanks to a few special _people._ I turned sharply onto Harry and Ron who bent their heads back a bit, fearing my wrath. "Harry. Ron. Why. Didn't. You. STOP HIM!"

They visibly and soundly gulped. I heard it clearly, but it may have also been due to my slayer senses. "He-he looked li-like he-he knew what he was do-doing." Ron's voice was practically _shaking_! I know what you're thinking- it's mean to scare your friends out of their wits, but still, it did feel good to have the power.

I rolled my eyes at their answer and pulled Spike up, putting his right arm around my shoulders for support and I placed my left arm around his waist. I left The Three Broomsticks, while Ron waited for Harry to place the correct pay on the table. I was left to deal with Spike. Alone. Again. Two times today, Harry and Ron had left me. Something was up; and it was about me. Lucky me.

"Heeeeeey, you're pr-preeeetyyyy. Wanna goooo for a driiiiink sometiiiiime?"

"Spike, it's me. SHUT UP. People are starting to stare." Which was actually true. Zambini and Malfoy had passed, staring at us strangely and suddenly started to crack up and laugh. I glared at them, especially Malfoy. He silenced immediately, remembering the punch. You could no longer see it, since Malfoys would never risk their reputation by walking around with any of part of their body damaged. No, duh. He probably used a concealing charm. Again, no duh. Malfoy's two idiotic bodyguards- Crabbe and Goyle, kept on laughing, not noticing my death glares aimed directly at them. I mean toilet seats had a higher IQ than those two gorillas. Parkinson was with them and she smiled, remembering the favor, but then she gave me a sympathetic look, which I figured was for three reasons. One: The guy I was supporting was drunk. Two: It was Spike. Three: It was a drunk Spike. Parkinson probably knew what it was like, having had been the cousin of the ex-girlfriend of Spike. Then, Seamus and Dean passed by, asking me if I needed help. I reassured them, saying I was okay. At least they cared, unlike two friends I have. A whole bunch of people went by. I began to grow anxious. How long does it take for a guy- no, two guys to pay a bloody bill? Spike was beginning to grow restless as well and was trying numerous of lame pick-up lines. I wish I had recorded it, then I would never let him live it down. When un-slurred they sounded like:

"Hey baby, can you feel the heat in the air or is it coming from you?"

"Did you just take a swim, cause you're wet!"

"Do you have a mirror in your pants because I can see myself in your knickers!"

"I think I just threw whip-cream down your shirt, here let me get it for you."

"Just from looking at you made me explode in my pants!"

Those were probably the _best_ of the pick-up lines that he said, the rest were just _horrible_! I was starting to get annoyed. "Spike, now really isn't the time to start hitting on me." Suddenly, a light bulb flashed above my head.

"Oh Spike," I said in a singsong voice. "Harmony's over there, and guess what she brought. Hogs! Oh, look, she saw you. She's coming this way this minute."

Spike became all wide-eyed and jumped four feet in the air. Literally. When his back was turned, I knocked him lightly on the head with my fist and he collided with the ground with a _Thud!_ Drunken people are always easy to knock out.

"Leviosa." Spike's unconscious body rose above the ground in midair at eye level to me. Harry and Ron finally came out. Ron was ahead of Harry, but he was walking backwards and facing Harry. He turned around suddenly and rammed right into Spike's legs. Ron fell backwards and knocked Harry down along with him, who was in close proximity. It looked like Dominoes really. People Dominoes.

I helped the both of them up and we walked back to Hogwarts as it was really getting late now. Right when we reached the castle doors, Spike woke up and started to spin around in the air. He was trying to get down but because of the levitation spell, he started to turn around like an animal over a fire. He also started to flap his arms in the air, which made him look like a retarded bird. I thought it couldn't get any better, but oh, it did. The most outrageous thing happened. Spike started kicking his legs out like a person on a swing would. So to sum it up, here was a guy whose whole body was spinning 360 degrees, flapping his arms wildly, thrusting his legs out, and screaming bloody murder- all at the same time. I managed to solve the problem, however, with a body bind spell. Genius, I know. And so, we all lived happily ever after.

THE END 

Pfft! Yeah, right. In your dreams. Not gonna happen. Not when your two best friends own brains and they start questioning you, wondering why on earth you're acquainted with a vampire and how we came to be even allies. It took them long enough; I was beginning to wonder if I could store tissues in their empty heads.

" 'Mione, can we ask you something?" Ron had on a thinking face. I wish I could see that more often and then, bye-bye 'copying off of my homework.'

"Anything." I answered. I knew where this was going.

"He's a vampire right?" Harry referred to Spike.

"Yes." I wish they would stop beating around the bush.

"How do you know him?" FINALLY! The question of the day has been asked! "How do you know he's harmless? How do you know he's even _good_?"

"You guys, I know these kind of things. Did you actually think I would be stupid enough to actually allow someone I deem dangerous, to go anywhere near Hogwarts? Of course not, I know better." I answered.

"Hermione, I don't think that's what Ron meant." Harry interrupted. "I think he's trying to ask _how_ did you two become-" Harry was searching for the right word. "-friends?"

I stopped and looked over at Spike. He was smirking, enjoying every minute of this. I wanted to go up to him and slap him and maybe even start a fight while he was in mid-air, but I resisted the temptation.

I looked around me for _anything_ that would get me out of this and then it clicked. I shooed Harry and Ron inside the castle and brought them to where the Room of Requirement should be. Spike was busy trying to scratch his nose, but couldn't due to the body bind spell. _I _smirked, enjoying every minute of _his_ suffering. Funny how I thought differently last night.

I walked back and forth three times, thinking hard in my head. The door appeared clicked open and I dragged Ron and Harry inside. Unfortunately, I have never tried bringing a levitated person through a single doorway. I decided to just try and see if Spike would suddenly turn ninety degrees and go headfirst into the doorway and into the room. Bad idea. He banged his head and feet against the hard stonewall on both sides of the doorframe. I did it again just for the hell of it. Now _that_ was a good idea.

"What are you trying to do? Give me a concussion, love?" Spike yelled. I pointed my wand at him and silenced him. Boy, did it feel good to have the upper hand. I then turned Spike vertically and managed to get him through the door, although he hit his forehead against the top of the doorframe the first time…and the second time…and the third time. You get the idea. I dumped Spike on the ground once we got inside and undid the body bind, the levitation spell, and even the silencing spell. How very stupid of me. I sat myself across from Harry and Ron and sighed.

"I don't know where to begin."

"From the beginning." Harry said, not gravely, but softly.

"It all started when I was with my friends, Alexandra and William, over the summer. William's a half-blood and Alexandra's a muggle-born, but their both wizards and witches. They're descendants of the friends of my great-great-grandmother, Buffy Summers. William descended from Willow Rosenburg and Alexandra from Alexander or Xander Harris. I was at the library when the librarian came up to us and left us a note:

REGOLUS, RANDY. 240.6 RE

It was the name of an author and a barcode for a book. We found it in the reference section. It was titled _The Great Tragedies of Evil_. We opened it and inside was another note. Accio!" A slip of paper flew to me. I passed it to Harry and Ron and Spike looked over their shoulders. I remembered every word, every punctuation in it.

_MISS GRANGER, MISS HARRIS, MR. ROSENBURG _

_I HAVE THE GREAT PLEASURE OF INFORMING YOU OF THIS GENERATION'S NEW VAMPIRE SLAYER, MISS HERMIONE GRANGER._

_GILES _

"The librarian, who we found out later was the "Giles" that sent us the note, appeared behind us and it kind of skyrocketed from there. His ancestor, who was also named Giles, was said to be Buffy's watcher, and now, this Giles is to be _my_ watcher. It's kind of like history repeating itself in a sense. William is now currently a student at Durmstrang. Alexandra is at Beaubaxtons. Dumbledore is trying his best to have them both transferred here. As the new slayer, it is my duty to protect others."

"But where does Spike here fit in?" Ron questioned.

"Spike was a friend of Buffy and her gang. He sacrificed his life trying to save Sunnydale in America."

"Hey, you should thank me. You wouldn't be here if I hadn't been there. Buffy would've died." Spike said.

"Well anyways, with the help of "The Powers That Be", Spike was brought back to life from the amulet he was wearing when he died. Before Angel, another vampire friend of mine with an actual soul, allowed Spike to leave, he made sure that Spike would not harm anybody, especially me, otherwise he would hunt him down like a bloody wolf. I know- I witnessed it first-hand. It was quite funny to see Spike get threatened from someone else besides me."

"Of course when I was first sired, I was nicknamed 'Bloody William.' Feared by everyone. And Angel was the mighty Angelus. Now he's not so tough anymore." Spike interrupted once more. I knew I never should've taken off the silencing spell.

"And neither are you, I might add. Giles, contacted Spike to help me train to become a stronger slayer, since he had worked with Buffy. Spike almost had a seizure when he saw Giles. Thought he was the bloody Giles whom he knew back then, coming back to haunt him."

"I did not have a seizure." He denied.

"Fine, I may have exaggerated. You _fainted_."

"I did not faint. It was merely from a lack of sleep." Spike tried to regain his pride.

"Yeah, uh huh, like vampires actually need sleep." My voice was dripping of sarcasm. "You guys have to promise not to tell anyone."

"We promise. Wizard's honor."

It felt good to tell them, Harry and Ron I mean. I never did like keeping a secret from them. They were like brothers; they knew _everything_ about me. You could ask them anything pertaining to myself and the two would get them right. Like I said, they were like brothers.

I stood up and stretched myself a bit. I was going to sit myself next to Harry and Ron, but then I heard it. Spike's head jerked up; he had heard it also. So it wasn't just me. I heard it again. You could not mistake it. I looked at Harry and Ron, but since they did not posses any inhumane strength or senses, they couldn't hear it. The thoughts that were probably going through their minds at that moment were '_Hermione's paranoid. Spike's paranoid. Passed on by association.'_ I turned back to Spike and we nodded. Harry and Ron were carefully watching our silent interaction. I stealthily walked to the door and put my ear against it. There it was again- scratching and shuffling noises. Spike flew up quietly and stayed on the ceiling above me.

"On the count of three." I whispered. It was so soft, one could barely hear it, but I knew Spike would. I clenched my left fist and raised my index finger.

"One." I kept my index finger up and raised my middle finger next.

"Two." There were more shuffling noises coming from the other side. It sounded as though someone was getting frustrated and impatient trying to get something. I raised a third finger.

"Three."

From the ceiling, Spike opened the door and I was fully prepared to attack and defend, depending upon my impulse. Spike jumped down and landed behind me, his arms in a ready position should anything happen.

There stood the last person I wanted to see, trying to stick two Extendable Ears into his pockets. Malfoy. He was caught. Malfoy- in the flesh. Red-handed. Malfoy, Malfoy, Malfoy. Eavesdropping. Poor Malfoy, was he in trouble now.

**A/N: Told you it was a long chapter! 18 pages! I don't know if I'll make the other chapters this long, unless I see some reviews! (hinthint)**


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: The plot is mine, the storyline is mine, Alexandra is mine, William is mine. Mine, mine, mine- all mine. Except for the Harry Potter characters. Except for the Buffy/Angel characters. They're J.K. Rowling's and Joss Whedon's. Besides, if they were mine, would I be writing on FF? Do the math.

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**A/N: I'm so sorry I haven't update in like FOREVER! It's just I've been studying for the finals. I know, I study two months earlier. Call me weird, but I think school is actually kind of…fun! Told ya I was weird. Lol.**

**I'm really disappointed at my readers. In my first chapter, there were 67 readers, but at least there were reviews. Now, there are about 60 readers also, but NO REVIEWERS! Why? It only takes a few seconds. You could just say, "Good. Please update." for all I care and I'll still appreciate it because it's the thought that counts. SO PLEASE _REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!_**

_Chapter 6: Aftershock_

"No, no, no, no! This was not how it was supposed to happen! I'm supposed to lead a secret identity as a slayer and hunt demons and vamps here in England and only Harry and Ron were supposed to know. You, Malfoy," I turned sharply upon him. "ruined everything!" I roared as I paced back and forth across the room.

"What are you going to do about it, Granger?" Malfoy smirked. I walked up to him and gave him a hard slap across his face.

"That's only the beginning. You deserve much more than a bloody slap. I dare say, you open your trap one more time and I'll do much worse. And you know it." I pressured. He did know. I remember the time he went into my room and I threatened to throw the flag at him—which I almost did the second time.

" 'Mione, may I suggest we burn him alive." Ron offered.

"Or torture him until he dies." Harry suggested.

"Or both."

"Or both." Harry repeated. They nodded their heads, agreeing upon evil schemes to take out Malfoy.

"Or turn him into a bouncing ferret like Moody did in fourth year."

"Or even better, lock him in a closet with Bulstrode."

"Or let Spike drink him to death."

"Or leave him in the girl's bathroom with Moaning Myrtle."

"Or watch and see when Snape is in the bathroom taking a shower and push him inside. Then, Snape will think his precious pupil is gay!"

"There's one problem with your plan, Ron, Snape probably never takes a shower. Just look at his greasy black hair." I exclaimed.

Ron began again. "Well, why don't we just force him into watching the muggle show Barney. I had a friend who had a friend who had a friend who had a friend who had a friend who had a friend who had a friend who had a friend who was forced to watch it because of Fred of George. After he finished watching it, he got up and ran out of the house crying, 'Mum! Mum! I hate muggle shows! I hate dinosaurs! Throw all the dinosaur stuff away!' Harsh stuff, mate."

"Um, that was you." Harry said, snickering.

Ron cleared his throat. He was still glaring at Harry when he said, "We could just turn him into a girl."

"Sorry, guys. Been there, done that. Didn't work out too well." I added. The boys groaned.

"But we wanted to see what he looked like as a girl!" Ron said. Under his breath, he whispered to Harry, "and maybe send it to the Daily Prophet."

"Ron, I heard that. You can't do that. It'll make the children cry." I said, my voice cracking up. Even Spike snickered. Ron's eyes widened; he didn't think I would hear that.

Spike spoke up, "Why don't you guys just call a truce. No need to nurse a grudge for that long."

I laughed. "That's such a preposterous and such a simple idea that its-" I paused and my smile faded. "-actually quite brilliant. Why didn't I think of that before?"

"Of course, it's brilliant! _I'm _brilliant!" Spike said. I smiled at his goofy grin.

Harry and Ron thought differently. They were gaping like fishes. "Are you really considering it, Hermione? Do you think it's such a good idea?" They looked wearily at Malfoy.

"Yes. We'll be civil to each other, no name-calling, and I won't have to go through a hard time this year. And you," I turned sharply onto Malfoy. "Will keep quiet or we four, including, will zero in on you and hunt you down." I said through my teeth.

All five of us shook hands to confirm the magical agreement that we had just accepted. Now no one could go against the arrangement otherwise they would experience a very painful zap. Of course, I made sure I could have the advantage of the "contract", so I said the words in Latin, the language of the scholars, and I wouldn't have to undergo the consequence otherwise. I know, brilliant, isn't it? Of course, the zap could only occur where guys hurt the most- the groin. I can't wait for someone to break the rules. I gave both Harry and Ron a goodnight hug. They lingered a bit, unsure of whether they could trust either Malfoy or Spike, or even both. I reassured them that I was safe and we all departed- Spike, Malfoy, and I to the Heads' tower and Ron and Harry to the Gryffindor tower.

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No one's POV

(_Words like this are Blaise's thoughts)_

Blaise slowly moved away from the door. He had cast an invisibility charm on himself and had followed Draco to the Room of Requirement.

_The Mudblood? The bookworm? The Know-It-All, who had a knack for a fear of heights? She was a-a slayer! _

_They are talking about the same person, right? Miss Goody-Two-Shoes Granger... _

He shook his head at the thought.

_Impossible._

He heard Harry and Ron come out of the room and stood rigid, beside a knight. As soon as he saw them walk a safe few feet away, he let out the breath he didn't know he had been holding.

"Mate, do you think 'Mione's still the same girl we've come to know and love?"

"Honestly, Ron, I don't know, but I do know we still have to be the friends _she's_ come to know and love." Harry responded.

"As for Malfoy, I still say we should have made him watch Barney." Ron said.

"Yeah, and in the process, _you_ would end up being the one that was tortured. _I love you, you love-_"

"Ok, ok. I get it." Ron said bitterly, remembering the nightmares he had received that night.

"_You love me. We are all a-_" Harry still sang.

"I said, 'I get it.' " Ron gritted through his teeth.

From where he stood, Blaise snickered…too loudly. Harry and Ron turned around on their heals and stared straight at the knight. They cautiously made their way towards it and looked up at where the armor covered the head.

"Harry, you don't think it's alive do you?" Ron said slowly.

"I'm not sure. Only one way to find out." Harry said. He lifted the helmet and found…nothing.

"I could've sworn I heard something."

"Me too."

They stood there staring at the knight for some time and moved their heads back and forth to the left and the right of the knight. They saw nothing. That's because Blaise was invisible. No shit. Hermione, Draco, and Spike walked out of the room right then and saw the two boys staring at the knight next to the door.

"I thought you guys would be back at the tower by now." Hermione said as she walked over to where they stood and looked at the same place where they were staring.

"What are you guys looking at? I see nothing."

Draco and Spike walked over too and started examining the knight also. Blaise shifted uncomfortably from where he stood and tried to slowly move away from the much-crowded area. However, Spike saw his movements. Spike reached out his hand, but felt nothing; his hand only an inch from grazing Blaise's arm.

"Huh, I thought I saw something." Spike stood there, staring at that spot. He was sure he spotted an object there. He shook the thought away as Draco spoke.

"Ha, looks like Pothead and Weaselbee were wrong again, like the bloody retarded fu-" a zapping sound cut him off. Draco fell to the ground, groaning.

"Bloody hell! Granger, what the fucking shit was that?"

Hermione gave a smirk that rivaled that of the infamous Malfoy family one. "_That_, as you so nicely put it, was the contract that you just agreed to."

"Please jog my memory and tell me exactly what I just did to myself." Draco said as he tried his best to stand up.

"Well, since you called us names and insulted us, you were made to suffer the consequences. And in this case, that would located right where it hurts."

"Thanks for tip, Granger." Draco said sarcastically. He groaned once more and heaved himself up. Using that time as a distraction, Blaise hurried away, able to successfully slip without the notice of anybody.

Thank Merlin. I thought I was going to die there- 

His thoughts were cut off for the second time that day as he bumped into someone. He looked up to meet the eyes of a very irritated and angry Snape.


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I own nothing, but the plot and some of the characters Alexandra and William, and some of the demons. If I owned Harry Potter and Buffy I wouldn't be stuck writing this for free, now would I?

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**A/N: I know this is a short chapter, but I needed this as an intercalary chapter. So enjoy! And please, please REVIEW! Good or flame, I don't care, but REVIEW! Or I'll come at night and I'll be sure to bring Big-Bad Voldy and Dracula with me. Mwuah ha ha ha! Cough cough (with a raspy voice) Please continue reading and ignore my pathetic attempts to be evil.**_Chapter 7: With Birth Comes Death_

Turn left down the hall and you will see a corridor lit with torches. Walk straight for exactly six feet. Knock four sixteenth notes to the tempo of eighty. The hidden door will slide open. Now, walk for another six feet and with your eyes closed, turn around 360 degrees. Open your eyes. You will now see in front of you seven doors to pick from. Choose the third one from your right and knock, in this order, a dotted quarter note and two eighth notes following it to the beat of eighty-five. Wait five seconds and then say, "Once more, with feeling". Walk down the stairs and brace yourself as you witness your first demon resurrection.

A group of hooded chanters stood around a fire holding ten microphones, one for each immortal.

_"More with feeling,_

_More with fire,_

_More with power-_

_Higher and higher!_

_Let these mortals sing,_

_Dance and burn._

_With merry tunes_

_Into their graves they turn!"_

They threw the microphones into the fire and held each other's hands and brought it up and down as they repeated the chant again and again. The fire vanished suddenly and in its place was a tall box. It was the kind magicians use to make their disappearing acts or the crappy "stick-swords-through-the-box-but-they-never-touch-the-person-inside" act. It was blue of color and decorated with gold stars on three sides; on the fourth side, it was dark red.

The lid of the box popped open and a green-skinned man- or thing- stepped out. He was dressed in an outfit only the Joker would wear. He had two red thorns sticking out of his head, beady eyes, and flaming red hair. No, not Ron's flaming red hair, but literally, flaming red hair, with fire coming out of it. He put his left arm to his stomach, while holding out his right and bowed and then switched arms so that his right arm was now to his stomach.

The demon spread both his arms out to its fullest this time and stepped up. "It's show time."


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: J.K. owns Harry Potter; I own the plot, blah, blah, you've heard it before. Need I repeat myself?

_A/N: So I guess all you readers of mine probably hate me after the short chapter, but I'm here to make it up to you now, with what I call "showbiz". Go grab some fresh popcorn and sit tight because all the fun's about to start…. now.

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**By federal law, no part of this story may be copied without the**

**authorization of the author. As stated in the handbook DARKANGEL**

**FANFICTION, Page 321, Column 1, Section 8, Article 321, Paragraph 4,**

**Line 24, readers are also allowed the privilege to criticize and praise the author.**

**(NO, DUH. So please take advantage of this honor and REVIEW for me!)**

_Chapter 8: Sing the Song and Sing Along_

"Hermione! Hermione! Hermione! It's sun-shiny!" My alarm clock sang.

"Hermione! Hermione! Hermione! Watch out- a bee!" A virtual bee flew out of me and zipped back inside the clock.

"Hermione! Hermione! Hermione Granger!" The clock sang such a high note I had to hold the pillow against my ear. The Fat Lady had been trying to reach such a high note since… forever.

"Hermione! Hermione! Hermione Granger!" It reached an even higher note. Oh, my ears! My poor ears!

Malfoy walked in, took one look at the alarm clock and smashed it with his fist. Then, he started to… sing! Bloody Draco Malfoy, prince of Slytherin, was _singing!_ That was so not part of the contract, but I like it. How degrading. I chuckled.

"_What the hell does a Slytherin have to do_

_To not wake up on the wrong side of the bed_

_Couldn't find my bloody shoe_

_And now I'm stuck listening to the music of the ugly reds_

_Bloody Grffindors_

_They can't even walk straight without hitting a door_

_Bloody Griffin-" _

He was cut off by a zapping sound. Haha, bull's eye. Malfoy groaned and headed downstairs. I just sat there on my bed wondering why on earth Malfoy was singing! I mean, I know I'm being redundant and repeating myself, but he has left me dumbfounded. Whatever it is, I'll find out. Hermione Granger never backs down from a challenge.

Spike was still sleeping on the couch when I found him and I just decided to leave him there. I headed out the door towards the Gryffindor tower to meet up with Harry and Ron.

"Animagus." I said. The Fat Lady opened the portrait door, giving me entrance, but not before saying, "It's a mess in there. Everyone's singing, and most of them _can't_ sing! It's one of Hogwart's worse disasters!"

Before I could say anything back, Neville spun me around and sang,

"Good to see you, 

_Good to see you,_

_Isn't a beautiful day?_

_The sky's so blue,_

_The day's anew,_

_Everyone's all happy and gay."_

Seamus then came up to me and sang,

"For him, there's no end- 

_He's been like as long as I've known._

_If you're looking for your friends,_

_Look for the ones who groan."_

At that, he left and I was spun once again by Ginny.

"_Oh me, oh my-_

_I don't know where to start._

_Dean can be so shy,_

_When it comes to do his part._

_He asked me to be his girl._

_He said I had a beautiful smile_

_That would light up his world._

_I guess this wait's been worth the while._

_Oh I said yes, Hermione, I said yes_

_My life's such a mess,_

_But I said yes, Hermione._

_Oh don't you see?_

_That love's in the air_

_All around, playing everywhere._

_Here and there_

_You cannot avoid something so fair."_

She started tap-dancing until I threw a pillow at her. Ginny returned to normal and clutched her head. "Oh, it feels like I have a major migraine; I might need a moment to collect myself, Herm." And with that, she collapsed on the couch. Okay… talk about a major mood change.

I found Harry and Ron arguing with each and singing. Could this day get any worse? (A/N: _Ron_ and _Harry._)

_"Harry, do you honestly think that!_

_You must be as blind as a bat!"_

"_Ron, you want to know the truth?_

_I don't give a shit, that's the truth!"_

"_Well, if you weren't such an asshead,_

_You would've have noticed that you're toothbrush's red._

_The one you were using was blue!_

_So of course, I give a shit about which one you use!"_

"_Sorry mate, must be because your lucky streak's run out_

_Guess you'll act like a baby and cry and shout."_

"_Well, you're not lucky any more_

_If you're about to get your ass kicked to Singapore!"_

"Boys, boys, boys! I have had enough of your silliness. Now say sorry so we can all go to breakfast! And no one is getting their ass kicked to Singapore, except the next person I hear with a song coming out of their mouth! Now let's go!"

They were dragged outside and for some reason, their singing stopped. We walked down the halls and threw the doors to the Great Hall open. Inside, I saw my worst nightmare. Everyone was singing and dancing! Some were on the tables and others were on the benches or floor, but they were all singing and dancing in harmony, as if it had all been choreographed and they all rehearsed for this together! Except for the teachers of course. Dumbledore seemed rather bemused, but I doubt he would ever pull this off. He wouldn't let classes be disrupted like this.

"_Hogwarts, Hogwarts -_

_welcome to the school of witchcraft and wizardry._

_Where the food's great and the classes are fun_

_There are so many towers and places to pee._

_There's no place better than this!_

_Because there's no place better to piss._

_Life's a game-_

_So many teachers so that.._

_Then what's a name,_

_If it's part of that?_

_But you can't refuse _

_Something you already knew_

_So now you know-_

_Hogwarts's the best place to go._

_Hogwarts, Hogwarts -_

_welcome to the school of witchcraft and wizardry._

_Where the food's great and the classes are fun_

_There are so many towers and places to pee._

_There's no place better than this!_

_Because it's- Hogwarts, Hogwarts_

_welcome to the school of witchcraft and wizardry._

_Where there's magic everywhere_

_Look around and you'll see_

_That there's no—_

_(no, no, no)_

_That there's no place better than _

_(No place better than)_

_No place better than- THIS!" _Everyone then fell on their knees and slid across the table or room with their hands in the air.

"Holy crap." Was all the came out of Harry's mouth. I merely nodded. Yes, holy crap.

The bell rang and all the students walked out of the Great Hall as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened and headed for class. Harry, Ron, and I just stood there frozen with our eyes still fixed on the same spots.

"Off to class now; you don't want to be late." McGonagall ordered. She pushed us out and closed behind us the double doors. We still stood there rigid. It wasn't until Headless Nick passed us that we were snapped out of our reveries. Of course, we were late, but was deducted points as there were substitutes. Nevertheless, my mind was to be found nowhere near the subjects discussed during classes today. Strangely enough, Dumbledore and the whole school didn't even address the situation at hand.

_It was as if this morning had never even existed. _

A/N: Sorry about the short chapter. HS has been keeping me preoccupied. I'll try my best to update quicker and with longer chapters but I can't assure that! AND PLEASE REVIEW...I AM DEPSERATE! I CAN TELL PEOPLE ARE READING BUT NOT REVIEWING! SO PLEASE REVIEW..._FOR ME? puppy eyes_


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: I am out of witty disclaimers (like I ever had any) so now, J.K. Rowling owns all HP characters, blah, blah, blah… you know the drill.

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A/N: The plot thickens. This is not the major problem Hermione's going to be facing. This is just one of them. The rest are coming in due time. Sorry about the short chapters but I only have about thirty minutes to produce a chapter so I'm trying my best. I don't want to leave the chapter for more than a day because I'm afraid I might start to slack off. So tell me if anything's not making any sense and REVIEW!

Thanks to **Violet Spark **_for her wonderful advice,_ **MiKaYGiRl****, Que Bonita, MauraderinglyMagical **FOR REVIEWING!

_Chapter 9: Mudbloods Equal Filth _

A deatheater walks slowly and gravely across the threshold. He is bearing a message pertaining to recent events that needed to be personally delivered to his master, otherwise the consequence would be—at the thought of it he shivered. The consequence would be worse than death. He passes through a doorway and enters a room decorated with bizarre and grotesque objects. A chill shot up his spine but it quickly departed as he was used to having to bear in mind these kinds of things.

A statue of a man, however not Jesus, was nailed to a crucifix. A noose hung loosely from the ceiling. There was one in every room; his master wanted to make sure that all his "guests" would be comfortable during the night. Off to the left, an assortment of weapons were placed there—some of them already bloodied. There had been a feast probably for the new arriving demons or Master had felt the need to kill. Either way, it made him smirk, which grew to a snicker. Filthy muggles. They all needed to be tortured, killed, _murdered—all of them_.

He exited the room and came in place of a new one. Though it wasn't very decent, not that any part of the shackled house was, it suited his taste. This room was quite clean and not a single bloodstain could be spotted anywhere. He enjoyed seeing filthy blood as much as he liked his master, who he was very devotional too. However, he didn't _live_ to see blood. That would have been considered psychopathic. He was almost, but not quite.

As he stood in the center of a shattered rug in the corner of the room, a loud swishing sound filled his ears. A tornado formed all around him and consumed him. Ten seconds later, he was standing on a hard stone floor, much different from the rotten wood a few seconds before. Darkness engulfed the surrounding areas and all he could see was straight ahead. He walked forward, not daring to look anywhere else but his destination—the throne.

A cloaked man sat on the throne. His face could not be seen, nor could the rest of his body. Darkness consumed everything in the man, if he was a man. The master extended an arm covered completely with the raiment.

"Why have you disturbed my peace? Of what significance is your presence at this moment? Speak or leave!" The man said, his tone full of authority.

"Master, I have come to bring you a report. It seems the plan is going accordingly. However, it is also suggested there is a leak in the ranks. The Order has managed to stop some of the massacres and not as many slayings have been able to be completed successfully."

"Silence! I don't want to hear a word pertaining the Order," he spat. "What I want to know is how many muggles have been killed. If you can't tell me what I've ordered you to, you might as well be deemed as worthless as the muggles." Here he drew his wand and pointed it at the trembling deatheater.

"M-Master, there is-is, I mean, ha-has been ma-many-"

The man at the throne interrupted him. "Compose yourself!"

"There have been many occurrences to your pleasure. The new demon, Ashkatar, has been very successful. The muggles are very distraught at the moment for they are as puzzled as ever. A total of twenty four people have died at the hands of Ashkatar for he has made sure that his "performers" would forget they ever sung or danced and soon enough, they would do it again, burning up into ashes. I have also made sure that Hogwarts would also be affected because I know how much you hate Dumbledore."

"Fool! How dare you act without my consent! You do realize that there are purebloods there and oh, my precious Slytherins! You could have reduced the number of new recruits! My loyal followers would be furious if they knew their children are being killed at this moment by their own leader! Out! Out with you! On the other hand… _avada kedavra!_"

A green light shot out of the tip of Voldemort's wand and hit the deatheater square in the chest. Immediately, two deatheaters entered and each taking a hold of an arm, dragged the cold man out. Voldemort rubbed his forehead in frustration and moaned. He needed to stop the demon; that was the only way to reverse the spell upon the students. _But that would also mean that the surviving muggles would also be lucky,_Voldemort thought._ However, on second thought, there are always going to be other chances to deal with the dirtied. _

Mudbloods—so gullible, so vulnerable. Oblivious they are. They are like puppets; us purebloods can maneuver their every move, manipulate their every thought. So easy. Too easy. It's always good to have competition in the game. Potter- he makes the game interesting. Always hanging around with his blood-traitor friend, Weasley, and the Mudblood girl, Granger. They're always saving the… the girl. The Mudblood. She's so gullible, she can be played into every trap I have. The blood-traitor has relations in the Ministry; it's best not to toy with him. Potter is too cautious; he blames everything on me, like the time the toilet erupted into his face, spilling out all the contents of that day, which was partly my fault, but I had Malfoy advise his son to do the decoy for me. The Mudblood it is then.

He clapped his hands and the double doors opened to let in two different deatheaters.

"I have a job for you. Find out as much as you can about Potter's Mudblood friend, Hermione Granger. She goes to Hogwarts and is in Gryffindor. It shouldn't be that hard to find her." The deatheaters were about to leave as they thought they were dismissed, but Voldemort held them back for more instructions. He wanted _nothing_ to go wrong. Nothing.

"If you are incompetent enough to fail to bring me the required information, you will join your comrade Antoine in the fiery pits. I want everything there is to know about this Hermione Granger. Id est. parents, relations, siblings, age, birth date, hobbies, interests, classes, et cetera. If you have to pull a few strings, do it. If you have to kill yourself in the process, do it. You have sworn your loyalty to me and no retreat can be given at any time, no excuses. Now, leave me be! And I don't want to see your face anywhere near me until you have completely fulfilled your tasks!" he warned.

Voldemort leaned back into his chair and sighed. Deatheaters. They could be as dull-witted as muggles sometimes, but nonetheless, they were superior. He stood up and stamped his foot down hard on the ground and squished an imaginary "muggle bug" and proceeded to spit on the ground. He sat down again and swatted at invisible "filthy flies". His isolation in the chamber had driven him to almost insanity, but his sanity as a leader remained. He still could find himself thinking clearly at times, to the point where clever plans were created, but his thirst to cleanse the world caused troubles.

His mind went back on the topic of Hermione Granger. Hermione… that was a name in Greek mythology was it not? Didn't that mythological character die a murderous death? Interesting. A specific mudblood had better watch her back, or in this case, her life.


	10. Chapter 10

Disclaimer: I own nothing… except for my iPOD, my computer, my water bottle I'm drinking from right now (hey, did you know that if you drink a lot of water, you have a greater chance of getting a clear face. Ok, I'll stop rambling.), my Valentine flowers (I think they're daffodils and I can spot a few daisies, lilies, and one red rose. Sadly, I don't have a boyfriend yet, but a lot of people gave me flowers and balloons and CHOCOLATE. Yes, I know, I said I'd stop rambling. Sorry) etc., etc. I hope you get what I mean by now: I own what I have, but J.K. Rowling owns what I don't have. I know, I know…. boo-hoo.

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A/N: People, people, people: REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW! I accept anonymous reviews now. Before, I didn't know I had that thing turned off; I must've have turned it on by accident and I disabled that. So all you anonymous readers out there, I would be deeply obliged if you would review and help to make this story better. I would prefer you give me constructive criticism on points of the story or comments of approval, but if you need to flame, well, flame away. God, I sounded so mature when I said that first part of the previous sentence, and then I began to sound like the teenager I am again. Wow.

_Thanks to **dracos-beauty girl **for reviewing._

**Dracos-beauty girl:** You know what I am going to say. Since you reviewed, I was more motivated to update faster.

Don't worry- I didn't forget my other helpful reviewers and faithful readers. As long as I know there are still people who like it, I'll continue this story. And if there isn't anyone left… well, I'll just stick my nose up and continue it still with whatever pride I have left. Anyhow, let's get on to the story.

_

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Chapter 10: I'm In Control_

It was that night that Blaise had to serve his detention with Snape, two days after the "incident". He was still as sour as ever, mad that he got caught all because he had bumped into the big oaf that his teacher was. Luckily, he had his invisible cloak to protect him; otherwise he would have taken many showers to clean off the germs Snape left. There had been rumors that Snape didn't take any showers…at all. Blaise shuddered. He didn't even want to think about how a person could get so dirty and _why_. If only, _if only_, Snape hadn't been there. Damn him.

Blaise looked up to meet the eyes of a very irritated and angry Snape. He grunted. Oh, was he in for it now. Snape stood there, shocked to find that there was an obstacle in front of him. How dare it stop him in his path! He took a step back and surveyed the area. There wasn't anything there! He took two steps forward, making Blaise take two steps back. It went on for quite some time. Blaise didn't dare move away- the clicking sounds of his shoes against the cold floors of the corridors could give him away. He could only synchronize his move with Snape's, but he was not very successful in moving too far away.

If I take a big step back, I might trip on the cloak and fall. Fucking shit, this sucks.

_No, duh. A second voice in his head said._

Shut the fuck up.

_You do know that talking to oneself is a sign of mental illness. _

I'm not mad. 

Denial is the second symptom of lunacy. 

Shut the fuck up. How many times do I need to say that?

Many. Either way, you're still talking to me. La la la la la la la la la la la. First, you're talking, and now you're singing? 

_As a matter of fact, you're still talking. I rest my case: you are either really really round the bend or you're really really stupid. I prefer both, though the latter does sound promising. Anyways, what do you think?_

I think you're really really screwed up.

In case you haven't noticed, I am you. I'm part of you anyways. So you're screwed up to because one, you said it so yourself and two, you're insulting yourself. And whatever I do, you're the cause of it too. Isn't it funny how that works? The second person said cheerfully.

No. Blaise thought solemnly.

If you don't find that funny, then you'll sure get a knock out of the look on Snape's face right now. He looks as though he's going to kill you for sure. 

_Sure enough, when Blaise looked up, he saw Snape hovering above him, casting a dark shadow upon him. In the discourse of his fight with his conscience, Snape had found where the **u**nidentified **f**lying **o**bject_…

Just kidding. (George)Fred and I had decided to fool around with the story. (Fred)Now, on to how the story really went down.

_In the discourse of his fight with his conscience, Snape had found where the unknown object was and plucked the cloak off. He had expected to find Potter. Oh, he couldn't wait for Dumbledore's precious Potter to finally get his first detention for this year. _

_Instead, his mood worsened as he found himself looking at his very own Slytherin. He unconsciously started to breath harder and his face became very red. Red as in the color of a cherry, that deep dark red kind of red. Very red. His nostrils began to flare like a dragon. If he wasn't a Slytherin, he could've been chosen to be part of the Red Hot Chili Peppers. Ok, so maybe not, but the name suited his face right then. It looked like he had just eater a ton (as in bushels) of chili peppers. It didn't help that Blaise continued to be oblivious to his presence._

_Blaise suddenly became alert and looked up, due to the warning of his conscience. He gave a weak smile and shrugged his shoulders._

"_What could I do to get you to forget this ever happened?" _

_This, however, only ended up getting Snape towards his dark side. He roared and at first, stomped after Blaise who backed up into the wall. Upon touching it, he decided the best thing to do was to make a run for it, which was actually advised to him by his conscience. _

_At the moment, Blaise wasn't really thinking everything through and had only acted upon impulse. He had though that running was a good idea, but do you think that for one second his conscience would recommend something for his well-being? I mean, he did cuss at his conscience. _

_So that's how the chase around the school started- with Blaise making a run for it and Snape following him all the way. Snape, being the smart person that he sometimes is, decided to borrow Dumbledore's marauders map and was able to track Blaise down and trap him at a dead end. _

_Did you also know that along the way Blaise accidentally ran into one of the Hufflepuff's Quiddith practice? _

_Hufflepuff, being the poor team that they were, tried to steer their brooms away from Snape and Blaise, but ended up steering towards them. Snape's long cloak ended up getting caught in the end of one of the beater's broom. The beater was headed toward the quaffle and had not known he had picked up extra weight._

"Aaaah!" Snape covered his face and the quaffle narrowly missed him. However, the bat didn't. It smacked his behind as hard as ever.

The Hufflepuffs were as bad at beaters as they were at defending themselves against the Slytherins. The beater tried to lower his broom gently to allow Snape to get off, but he ended up doing a nose-dive towards the field grounds, which stopped when Blaise decided enough was enough and he stopped the broom himself with his wand and descended it down slowly.

It was that bravery that had reduced his time in detention. But it was also that gall that had gotten him in detention in the first place. And don't forget that impudence had made sure that Snape would have a hard time sitting down every time.

He sighed and started to dust the bookshelves. Then, he would have to organize the potion books in alphabetical order. And then, organize the potions cabinet. And clean the cauldrons. And clean the vials. And dust the floors. And do this and do that for the next two weeks. At least it wasn't three weeks.

He sighed again. Blaise opened his mouth and proceeded to sing a mellow rock song:

"_What kind of life is this __If I'm stuck doing Snape's chores  
__At least it's only two weeks,  
__But for then, my life's a bore._

_When did the sun go down  
__And Sagaciousgo away.  
__My actions turned around  
__And my consequences had to pay._

_But I'm in control of every aspect;  
__I'm another ruler of Slytherin.  
__People bow down in respect,  
__And that's just the beginning._

_I'll find a way to release me as a slave.  
__I'll find myself a lovely queen  
__Who can meet my every gaze  
__Because I'm in control of me. _

_I don't live for power, I don't live for grace-  
__I need a smile, I need some passion.  
__At times I live for that one sweet embrace,  
__But for now, I think I'll stick to the smashing_

_But I'm in control of every aspect;  
__I'm another ruler of Slytherin.  
__People bow down in respect,  
__And that's just the beginning._

_I'll find a way to release me as a slave.  
__I'll find myself a lovely queen  
__Who can meet my every gaze  
__Because I'm in control of me. _

Angry at the insolence, Snape reprimanded Blaise to stop by intervening in his song, and _singing too_. He used the same song, but sang with a much gruffer and harsher voice.

_**(Snape) "What are you doing, boy  
**__**Do you find detention fun  
**_**_Very well, here's some brooms, not some toys_**  
_**Don't let me catch you air-guitaring while your work's undone. **_

_**That'll teach you to mess with me.  
**__**Running won't get you away with everything  
**__**Especially if the trouble's coming from me.  
**__**That's your fault, boy, and your sin."**_

_(Blaise) "Oh no Professor  
__I believe I haven't learnt anything  
__Thing happen and things occur  
__And they all happen for a reason.  
_

_But I'm in control of every aspect;  
__I'm another ruler of Slytherin.  
__People bow down in respect,  
__And that's just the beginning._

_I'll find a way to release me as a slave.  
__I'll find myself a lovely queen  
__Who can meet my every gaze  
__But I'm in control of me. _

_I'm in control of me.  
__No one can mess with me.  
__I'll be the greatest, you'll see.  
__I'm in control, I'm in control, I'm in control of you."_

Here, Blaise stopped singing. Snape lost his fierceness and his face suddenly became unemotional as always. They had forgotten everything that had happened. It was all ancient history as though the event that just took place was but a mere incident.

It just so happens they were Slytherins, pure-blooded Slytherins perfect candidates as deatheaters with their wit and mental power. Ashkatar's spell erased their memories. They would all sing again and forget about it. Then they would crumble up into ashes and die. Poor Snape. Poor Blaise. Poor world.

Could they be saved? And what did Voldemort plan to do with Hermione Granger?


	11. Chapter 11

A/N: Nothing to say now, except thanks to:

**dracos-beautygirl:** Blaise's conscious is the best one to have if you want to be cheered up, but the worst one for any other day or mood. That just sucks for Blaise doesn't it? Also, the singing was caused by a spell that's been spreading through the muggle world and Hogwarts, so you'll find songs catching you off guard very often from now on.

**READERS:** ReViEw REVIEW ReViEw REVIEW ReViEw REVIEW ReViEw REVIEW ReViEw REVIEW ReViEw REVIEW ReViEw REVIEW ReViEw REVIEW… I think I got my point across by now.

_Chapter 11: Trail Along, But Leave No Trail_

(Put on some spy music: dun dunnn dun dun dunnn dun dun dun dunnn…)

The deatheaters crept along the corridors of Hogwarts. They had taken a lot of trouble and gone through much expense to get inside.

(Imagine a James Bond spy scene, only except the spies are working for the evil of mankind.)

"Bshh. Over." The deatheater, Erile, imitated a static noise through the wizard walkie-talkie.

"Bshh, copy. Over." His friend, Locke, answered through his black walkie-talkie.

"Bshh, subject spotted. Over."

Just then, Hermione walked past, carrying a plate of food in her hands.

"The eagle has landed. The eagle has landed. It is fast approaching its nest. Over."

Hermione said the password and walked through the entrance of the Heads' Tower.

Erile stepped out from where he was hiding and Locke did the same.

"Bshh, the eagle is in its nest. Safe to proceed. Bshh. Over." Erile said.

"Erile, we're only 5 feet away from each other. Stop using the damn walkie already."

Locke needed to take only one step and snatched the two-way radio from his comrade's hands.

"And why are we using 'eagle' to code-name the Mudblood?" Here, Locke threw up his hands.

"Why don't we just choose some random names then? How about 'Kenny' or 'Harris'?" He said sarcastically.

(A/N: A special sundae or triple mocha latte for the readers who know where I got the codenames above and the one below from. Hint: they're from two shows.)

"Or how about 'assface' maybe? We'll just have to deal with 'assface' here as directed by Master."

"My, aren't we the cheery one today." Erile answered to his friend's disdain.

"How wonderful of you to notice. I'm actually surprised that you brain power left from looking at muggle porn all day."

"It's not porn, it's Playboy."

"What's the diff?"

Erile shrugged his shoulders and said, "Why don't we just name her Regnarg."

"Huh?" Locke's face was completely blank.

"It's Granger backwards, _ass-face_."

"You want to see an ass-face? Look in the mirror." Locke retorted.

"No need. I see one everyday. And isn't it a coincidence that it belongs to your body? My, my, my. I wonder what your parents looked like. I mean, like the saying goes 'Ugly plus ugly equals uglier.' So butt-face plus butt-face equals ass-face. Neat, huh?" Erile said.

"Just shut up and start recording."

A pen and quill appeared with a _poof!_ in mid-air, which Erile picked up and started to write.

_Day 3: _

_6 A.M. Regnarg wakes up._

_7:12 A.M. Regnarg exits Heads' tower and walks to Gryffindor tower._

_7:30 A.M. Regnarg walks with Rettop and Yelsaew to commons to eat breakfast._

_7:57 A.M. Exits commons and separates friends. Walks to Potions class with Snape._

_8:00 A.M. Arrives at Advanced Potions._

_9:30 A.M. bell rings and exits room._

_9:32 A.M. Meets with Rettop and Yelsaew again._

_9:37 A.M. Heads back to Heads' Tower and picks up Transfiguration books._

_9:41 A.M. Is at door of Transfiguration class._

_9:45 A.M. Bell rings and all students go to class._

_11:15 A.M. Bell rings and Regnarg exits class with fellow classmates._

_11:21 A.M. Meets with friends at tree near lake._

_11:30 A.M. Lunch time. Heads to commons again._

_11:34 A.M. Locke goes to restroom. I go too. He ends up somehow pissing on me. Bad aimer. _

_12:30 P.M. Lunch ends and Regnarg goes to Herbology._

_12:34 P.M. Is at greenhouse. Locke goes pee in the bushes. The bushes are actually archaetriplantae. They have teeth (big teeth) and three eyes and can move around and make noises. The pee pisses off the plants. They go after him. I point and laugh._

_2:00 P.M. Class ends and Locke has killed the archaetriplantae. Poor plants. Regnarg takes stroll around lake. _

_2:13 P.M. Blonde boy walks up to her. He is not a student. Unknown subject. _

_2:22 P.M. Unknown subject leaves._

_2:25 P.M. Regnarg goes back to Heads' tower and gets books._

_2:27 P.M. Sees Rettop and Yeslaew again. Say hi and the three goes in different directions._

_2:30 P.M. The bell rings and Regnarg is in A.P. History of Magic._

_3:16 P.M. Regnarg asks to use the bathroom._

_3:18 P.M. Arrives back at class._

_3:46 P.M. Locke sees another plant. I know it's an archaediplantae. It looks different from an archaetriplantae because it's smarter and faster. He doesn't know. He puts a rock in its mouth. It spits it out and hits Locke's forehead. I point and laugh. The plant chases Locke around until he runs into a closet and hides. _

_3:50 P.M. The plant goes away, but I don't tell Locke. He stays in there._

_4:00 P.M. The bell rings and Regnarg is out of class. _

_4:14 P.M. Same unknown subject approaches Regnarg and they go into Heads' tower._

_4:20 P.M. Locke is still in the closet._

_5:37 P.M. Regnarg exits Heads' tower but unknown subject is not with her. _

_5:39 P.M. Regnarg enters library._

_6:46 P.M. Regnarg exits library. I let Locke out of the closet. I told him I killed the plant for him. He believed me; fool._

_6:48 P.M. Regnarg enters Heads' tower._

_6:57 P.M. Exits Heads' tower and has changed clothes. Heads to the commons._

_7:00 P.M. Dinner time. Regnarg is with Gryffindor friends. Unknown subject is not there._

_7:45 P.M. Dinner ends and Regnarg exits with friends._

_7:49 P.M. They enter the Gryffindor tower. (Password: animagus)_

_9:32 P.M. Exits tower and goes back to tower. Malfoy Junior meets her at the corner. They go back to Heads' tower. Can't get password. Locke tries to guess it. Look for the word "stupidity" in dictionary and see if I can find his name in the definition._

_9:46 P.M. Exits Heads' tower and goes to portrait and tickles the pear. The portrait opens and enters._

_9:50 P.M. Exits the room with a plate of food._

_9:54 P.M. Enters the Heads' tower._

Locke looked over his shoulder as Erile wrote the last statement. Lucky for both of them, Locke did not read the whole parchment.

"Okay, we're good for the day. It's time to retire."

Locke threw a pinch of different colored powder into the air and a portal opened. Locke stepped first inside and Erile followed him.

However, the quill dropped out of Erile's pocket as he stepped in the portal. The tip touched the ground but held. The portal closed, leaving no signs of deatheater activity except for the quill.

A/N: REVIEW!


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